Page 87 of Wood You Rather?


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The tent was large, but being trapped inside it with an angry moose was likely incredibly dangerous. Thankfully, the people nearest to the creature were already cautiously putting distance between themselves and it.

But a shrill scream rang out behind us. “Cliiive!”

A whir of blond curls and a sparkly purple dress whizzed by me as Goldie charged at him. Clive, to his credit, was unbothered as he used his massive tongue to swipe at the frosting on his snout.

Dropping my arm, Paz snagged Goldie by the waist and scooped her up.

“Goldie,” Paz murmured, holding her tight as she wiggled and thrashed against him, “get in the house.”

“But I wanted cake,” she cried, tears running down her cheeks and mixing with a layer of grime. Her fluffy dress was already streaked with dirt.

Suddenly, Henri appeared in front of us, holding up both arms. “Please exit the tent on the opposite side and head toward our house. Your safety is the most important thing right now.”

Goldie let out a sob as we shuffled off the dance floor.

“We don’t want to scare him or make him feel threatened,” Paz explained to her as she wiped her nose on his shoulder.

The band had stopped playing, and half the guests were still frozen, watching as a moose slowly ate what had been a very beautiful and probably very expensive cake.

After Clive had decimated about half of it, he moseyed away, seemingly unconcerned by the commotion he had caused. At this point, a good chunk of guests had left, and others had sought the warmth and safety of Henri and Alice’s house.

We stood on the porch, watching the carnage. Beside us, Alice was laughing hysterically. “It’s payback,” she said between giggles. “For the time I threw tampons at him.”

My head snapped around. “What?”

Henri had his arm around her and was chuckling as well. “Asshole moose,” he said, shaking his head.

“One time he stole our clothes when we were skinny dipping,” Remy said as Hazel’s face reddened.

How was this possible?

I turned to Paz for an explanation. Why was his family acting like a moose crashing a wedding was a regular occurrence? And how could they be so casual about the sentient and clearly vindictive wildlife?

“Clive is not your average moose.”

Chapter26

Pascal

In the parking lot of the Ape Hanger, I killed the engine and looked over at her. “Are you sure you wanna do this?”

She pulled down the visor and fluffed her hair. It was not in its usual ponytail today. Instead, it was cascading down her back in all its dark and shiny glory. Basically begging me to run my fingers through it and give a gentle tug.

We were in Heartsborough, which was across the river from Lovewell. Our town rival for generations, it was home to a small downtown, a few doctors’ offices, and the headquarters of LeBlanc timber.

It was also the home of the Maine Marauders, a local biker gang. We’d always steered clear. Dad had distrusted the bikers, and they rarely worked on our crews, but they’d been around my whole life. Everyone knew the bikers sometimes got mixed up in shit, so I was concerned about walking into their headquarters.

And after learning about the threatening note and our stakeout gone wrong, the stakes were feeling even higher. Parker was no longer a cop, but that didn’t matter to these types. I didn’t want her going in there at all, but I had to settle for going with her.

She slipped a small canister of pepper spray and what I suspected was a taser into her girlie purse, then reapplied her red lipstick.

“You’re a hell of a woman.” Censoring myself around her was damn near impossible anymore.

She turned and winked. “Don’t get in my way in there. I’ve got criminals to uncover.”

“You know most bikers are not criminals, right?”

She squinted at me, annoyed. “Yes, but according to the federal tracking database, some of these bikers are. And they have ties to oxycodone trafficking. I have a feeling we can get some leads here.”

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