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Whoever had done this to the man had made a mess out of him. It looked like his hands and feet had both been crushed, as well as his knees. There were small wounds all over his body, but most of the blood loss came from the area of his genitals. Someone had decided to castrate the victim and remove all signs of his manhood. Blood loss and shock would have been enough to kill him.
I fought back the urge to start an examination. I didn’t have my kit or any gloves, and technically I wasn’t coroner since I’d taken leave after my own brush with death.
But something stirred inside me that I hadn’t felt over the last few months. A spark of life. Of purpose. Lying in a hospital bed gave a person too much time to think—to question how much worth one really had. And I wanted this case. I wanted to keep my mind and my hands busy so I wouldn’t think of other things.
I needed to call into the station and report the scene, but even the thought had my breath hitching and sweat trickling down my spine in cold rivulets. I wasn’t sure I was ready to face them all. My friends. My acquaintances. My enemies. Being back in town would almost be as big news as the body. But mostly I wasn’t ready to face Jack.
There wasn’t a choice. The universe had decided it wasn’t through with me yet, even though I’d started to wonder. I’d have to face everyone sooner or later, so I pulled the phone from my pocket and dialed before I could second-guess myself.
“Dispatch,” a woman answered.
“This is Doctor Graves. I’ve got a body.”
Chapter Two
I moved the Suburban and parked a little further down the lane to let the official vehicles get through, and I sat there in the dark with my coat wrapped around me until the first squad car arrived on the scene. I’d only had to wait about fifteen minutes. That had given him long enough to roll out of bed, throw on some clothes and make the drive across town. Not bad.
The eerie yellow of headlights cast shadows around the sharp bends in the road as the black and white came to a stop in front of me. He hadn’t bothered with flashing lights or blaring sirens. It wasn’t Jack’s way. He was a good cop. Too good of a cop to be stuck in Bloody Mary writing traffic tickets and settling petty disputes. But he had his own demons to deal with, and I knew better than anyone that sometimes you just needed a refuge. Maybe I’d never really understood the demons he faced until now.
My lungs started to burn, and I realized I was holding my breath. It had been twelve weeks and four days since I’d last seen him, and I hadn’t even been able to say goodbye or tell him I was running away for a while. I couldn’t face him. Not after everything we’d been through.
He’d have understood my reasons for leaving, and he would have helped me pack and make the arrangements with more ease than I’d managed on my own, but things were off between us. Jack Lawson was the best friend I’d ever had. He wasstillthe best friend I ever had. But something had changed in those days before my near death, and we looked at each other differently now. Or maybe it was just me looking at the world differently, and it wasn’t him at all. That would almost be worse somehow.
Jack’s deputies wouldn’t be far behind him, and part of me wanted to stay hidden inside the Suburban until there was a crowd surrounding us. That cowardice was the exact reason I pushed open the door and put my shaky legs on the ground. I left my headlights on, and I leaned against the hood of the car, trying to look casual, and then I watched as he reached into his cruiser and grabbed two silver travel mugs of steaming coffee and a high powered flashlight.
I tried to look at him as a stranger would. We’d been in and out of each other’s pockets our whole lives, and it was easy to take someone for granted when they’d always justbeen there. I’d forgotten how big he was—six-feet-five-inches of solid muscle—broad shoulders and lean hips. He’d been S.W.A.T. in D.C. before he’d taken the job of sheriff here, and he still kept the same rigorous exercise regimen.
His dark hair was cropped close to his head and a five o’clock shadow peppered with the occasional hint of silver covered his face, though he was only a couple years over thirty. His buckskin colored shearling coat was unzipped so I caught a glimpse of his green flannel shirt and shoulder holster as he walked with easy strides towards me. He was backlit by the glare of his own headlights, and even in the shadows, he made an impressive picture. He’d always been too handsome for his own good, but I’d never thought of him as such until recently. He’d just been Jack.
“Your hair’s longer,” he said, handing me one of the mugs.
I tried not to flinch at his nearness. I’d had a little trouble with people being close enough to touch me after my incident. He pretended not to notice when I scooted over a little, and he leaned against the hood next to me as we sipped our coffee in silence for a few minutes.
I’d never been one to think on my appearance overly much. I’d spent too many years in med school and living on an hour’s worth of sleep to have time to care. But part of me wondered what exactly Jack saw when he looked at me. I hardly ever wore makeup, but I had good skin, nice grey eyes, and high-cheekbones I’d inherited from someone. I was mostly average in every way—average height, average weight, average breasts. Not like the women he was normally attracted to. And I knew, because I’d seen legions on his arm over the years.
“I wasn’t expecting you until sometime tomorrow,” he said, breaking the silence.
I looked up sharply so my eyes rested on his chin. I didn’t quite have the courage to look him in the eye yet. I hadn’t told anyone of my plans to leave my parents’ cabin in the Poconos. I hadn’t even decided I was leaving myself until twelve hours ago. Some of the things I’d found out about my parents while staying there hadn’t made it a place of rest. And the FBI had managed to find me there as well. Almost two years after their drive over a cliff and there were still unanswered questions. I knew some of the answers now. But I wished I didn’t.
Jack’s fingers barely touched my chin and he tilted my face up until our eyes met. I tried not to jerk out of his grasp, but it was difficult. The only thing that kept me still was the fact that I knew he’d be hurt if he knew I no longer liked to be touched. Even by him.
“You didn’t think you were staying up there all alone without someone keeping tabs on you, did you? What if you’d gotten into trouble or had a relapse?” He raised a brow in question and I could see the censure in his gaze, letting me know without words that he’d been hurt I’d left without saying goodbye.
I could have gotten angry at his overprotective nature, but I just didn’t have it in me. I think somewhere inside, I’d known he wouldn’t just let me go away on my own. He’d probably alerted every cop in the area to keep an eye out for me. I turned my head away, and he dropped his hand so it curled back around his cup.
“Backup will be here soon,” I said to change the subject.
“We’ve got a few minutes. I told them to take their time.”
“Why would you tell them that?”
He dug into his coat pocket and pulled out a pair of thin latex gloves. He held them up in front of my face so I had no choice but to stare at them.
“Because I thought I’d need the extra time talking you into coming back,” he said, smiling sheepishly. “But I can tell by the gleam in your eye I might have overestimated my time frame a bit. I’ve got a job opening for a new coroner. What do you say, Doctor Graves? The hours are lousy and the pay is even worse.”
He could have said a million different things on this first meeting after being separated for so long. He could have asked how I was doing or feeling. He could have pulled me into his arms and tried to rekindle that brief moment before my incident where the sparks between us had almost turned to flame. But he just stood beside me like he had my whole life—solid and undemanding—and given me the one thing he knew I needed more than anything else.
Tears clouded my eyes and I blinked them away rapidly before I made both of us more uncomfortable than we already were.
