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“I’m okay. I promise. The doctor thinks I’ll get the full range of motion back. That is the best possible outcome.”
“That’s good. I should go. It’s getting late, and I have to be up early.”
“Take care of yourself.”
“I will. You do the same.”
I end the call. Looking out at the ocean, I take a steadying breath. I feel relieved that I told her.
As I wander around the villa, I remember skiing in the dark and how good it felt not to overthink everything and simply follow Alex down the mountain. I could feel a spark and a connection from the moment we met. I trusted him not to disappear or go too fast. It scares me.
I want to push the limits and experience more with him. Does he want that?
I close my eyes. Being intimately involved with Alex adds so much complexity. I’m not sure if I’d want to be here without him. I want to show him that I can do this. But instead of focusing on him, I need to prove to myself that I can do this. For the last ten years, I’ve focused more on romantic relationships than on myself. Maybe it’s time to let go of this need for a life partner. I spent all of college focusing on Adam, and then, for the last four years, it’s been Josh. They both walked away when I became too clingy, and I wanted more than they wanted to give. This time, I won’t serve my heart on a silver platter.
12
Craving Oblivion (Alex)
As I step onto the dock in the late afternoon sun, the boat of newly fledged divers makes its way in. Imogen had asked for space to focus on this course. Given her fear of the ocean, I expected to help her navigate the process.
But I’ve been encouraged by the updates from Sam. Apparently, Immy has proven to be a natural in the water and has passed the certification requirements.
Another diver gets off first and securely ties the boat to a mooring. When Imogen steps onto the dock with her equipment, I move forward and kiss her briefly on the mouth. “Hey, stranger.”
She smiles. “Hey, yourself.”
I tamp down the adrenaline rush vibrating through my limbs. Her cheeks and nose are slightly pink, and the wet suit clings to her feminine curves.
Sam shuts off the boat engine. After a few minutes of securing everything, he says, “Stop in the office to collect your certificates. You all did amazing today.”
I shake Sam’s hand as he passes by.
He says, “You have a good one here.” He winks at Imogen.
I let the other divers go ahead of us.
“You’re quiet. You should be excited and proud.”
She holds up her hands. “I’m not sure how to feel. I don’t know what you expect.”
I lean closer to her and say, “I don’t expect anything. I’ve missed you.”
Holding her gaze, I hear her breath catch.
“Have I done something to upset you?”
She shakes her head. “This diving course was a stretch for me. I’m uncomfortable in the water and didn’t know anything about the equipment.”
I touch her shoulder. “Sam said you did brilliantly.”
She lifts her chin. “You were keeping tabs on me?”
I run my fingers along her collarbone. “Yes, most certainly. I wanted to make sure that you were okay.”
Her eyes darken. “Won’t Sam think it’s odd that you’re hooking up with one of your employees?”
My chest tightens, and I make an effort to relax my muscles. “I don’t care what others think.”
