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I snuggle against him, my cheek on his collar. He strokes my hair, and I could fall asleep to the motion of his fingers gliding through the strands.
I love this.I’m discovering what I love in being with a guy, but there is a creeping notion in the back of my head telling me,you’ve discovered this before.But with who? And how could this possibly be a feeling I’ve felt with more than one person?
The finale is gripping enough that I pull out of those bad thoughts. “Ohhh whaaa, no way.” I sit up off Donnelly. “No freaking way.” I gape at the television screen. “Nowaynowaynoway.” My hands fly to my head. “Strider is Callie’sson. That’s his mom…” I was shipping a mother and a son! “What the…shit.” I sink backwards, then look over.
Donnelly is grinning.
“It’s not funny. I feel like crying.” I cringe and shiver, all gross inside.
He wraps an arm around me. “I’m not smiling ‘cause I’m happy your ship sunk.”
“No, itburnedto a crisp,” I mutter, still not understanding his reaction. “Why do you look happy?”
“‘Cause you were spoiled the first time you watched the finale. It’s cool seeing you watch it without knowing what’s gonna happen.”
I smile. “I got a redo.”
“Yeah, you did.”
“Amnesia perk,” I sing-song. “There aren’t many.”
“We’ll make more,” he says like it’s a real possibility and not fiction. I hang on to the depth of his expression, his sincerity as it burrows into me.
He’s attractive.The way he had been gripping asandwichtoday was hot, and I wonder if I always found his mannerisms and his whole being so sexy.
With the quiet, the TV paused on the credits, and the glowing space, I start diving down a rabbit hole, imagining our first time together. Was it like an explosion of passion? Fast and forceful? Or slow and sensual? How did he take her? He said they wore masks one time…or maybe it was more than once.
Will he even want to have sex with me if I don’t have those memories?
“You like the show?” he asks, even though my brain is halfway down his pants.I want him all the way down mine.
“Yeah, it was epic.” I look to the TV. “I’m definitely going to do a rewatch sometime, see if I can pick up any hints that I missed.”
“We were gonna go to a convention next month together in San Francisco, if I can get off work. The actors will be there.”
“Really?” I smile. “We’re still going?”
“That’s what I was gonna ask you.”
“I’d go with you.”
He smiles. “I’ll put it in my calendar. Doodle stars and planets next to it.”
“With glitter pen.”
“Only glitter pen.”
I start to smile too. I wonder if this is an official date, but we don’t bring it up. As he collects our snack trash, cleaning up, my stomach tightens. I’m not ready for him to leave.
Stay.
“Did you care a lot about your virginity?” I ask out of left field. It brings him back down to the sofa, and honestly, I could stay up talking to him for hours upon hours, or really, just be with him doing nothing at all. At the way he’s looking at me, I wonder if he could too.
“Why do you want to know?” he breathes.
I shrug. “You know I didn’t care a lot about mine. I was just thinking about yours.”
“Did I care about it?” Donnelly thinks, outstretching his arm on the back of the couch right behind me. “Not really. I lost it in the most unspectacular way possible. Back of a Chevy. Girl told her friend, who then told someone else.”
