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I’m trying not to drum up bad theories. It’s better if I just talk to my little elf and see what’s wrong. I sigh out, then nod. “Well, my boss hasn’t called me and said I’m being transferred, so it can’t be that bad if your brother still wants me to protect him.”
Though, that could change at any point. The fact that it hasn’t tonight is the positive I’m pocketing like a Lucky Charm. Gonna ride the marshmallow to a pot of gold, hopefully.
She hugs an arm around Orion. “I think the rumor Delilah Avalon spread about Xander yesterday is being overshadowed by my leaked fics. It probably won’t gain any steam, so that’s good at least for him.”
Xander had been pretty anxious about the lie spreading online. The one where Delilah said he had sex with her after homecoming.
I wouldn’t call Luna being blasted in tabloids “good” but I’m not gonna squash her fledgling positivity, so I let it linger.
“He’ll be alright,” I breathe.
She nods, quiet again.
I’m about to go soon.
I don’t really want to, but at least I won’t be far.
She swallows hard, her throat bobbing. “I understand whywe can’t be together.”
I turn back to her. “Yeah?”
“I’m not living in a delusion. Your family could try to hurt me like they tried to hurt Beckett, right?”
I stiffen. Go cold.
She winces. “I don’t want to dig out things you don’t want to share. I really don’t—”
“You’re not,” I say softly, the words ache inside my throat. “You’re not, Luna.”
She intakes a bigger breath. “I know you’ve told me a bit about your past, but I just want to know more about your family. And I’m not your girlfriend. I get that I’m only a friend now who’s waiting for you…for us. Maybe I haven’t earned anything more.”
“You don’t have to earn it,” I say, then stare at Moondragon swimming happily in the fishbowl. It’s easier looking away, not seeing her reaction. “But I dunno. It’s not like you can meet my parents. These pieces of my life aren’t touching you. I’m making sure of that.”
“It doesn’t mean I don’t want to know…and there are pieces of my life that I’ve never shared with you. Things I don’t even think could have been spread through the bodyguard rumor mill.”
I know that.
I look at her, and there’s a heaviness in her eyes. Sex addiction, media, past hookups that’ve hit tabloid headlines—those are things she hasn’t wanted to talk about. There’s been more, definitely. I’ve always known she’s more than the rumors I’ve heard.
She’s told me some stories of being bullied, but to what extent, I can’t be so sure either. Luna guards a lot of memories like I do.
Do I want to know more? Yeah, I want to know every last detail of her life. Of who she is. It’s a hunger. An urge, and she must be craving the same from me.
We’re the same.
But we’re different too. Our differences are like unopened booksbeggingto be consumed. As far as I go, I’ve never been read front-to-back by anyone, but I’d check out a library card just to read all of her. She’s the writer, though. I’m sure her insides are a whole lot more eloquent than whatever’s living in me.
“I want to know more about you too,” I cement. “Whatever you want to give me, especially if it’s everything.”
“Will you give me everything?” she asks.
Yes,is the first gut reaction.I’ll give you my world.
Except there are dark parts of my world that I’d rather she never really see.
So I end up saying, “I’m gonna try.”
“Same.”
