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I'm so very, completely, totally lost to him that I don't think I could find myself and get myself back where I'm supposed to be with a flashlight and a map or even with a damn GPS system guiding me.
Honestly, I don't even know that I would really want to be found by that cold, scared part of me that so insistently wishes to be boss and hold me back.
Still, even surrendering to the part of my heart that wants to trust what's going on around me, what Carson's been doing for me, and what he's been telling me, is not easy.
I've spent the better part of three days avoiding him, but damn, I miss him!
How can I miss someone I just met so much?
And why does he have to make things so very difficult for me?
He's been texting me a lot.
He texts me to say, 'good morning' and 'goodnight' and doesn't stop making goofy jokes until I answer back with a greeting of my own, to the point that I'm positive there are probably at least 10 brand-new texts from him sitting in my phone even right now. And he is fun and cute and has a wicked sense of humor. Even his cockiness is kinda charming. It definitely grows on you. And he's nice, so nice that Google should eat its shirt for the lies printed on this guy, and he keeps asking me why I left and begging me to go out with him.
And if all of this wasn't enough to get me starting on the whole swooning thing, he has been sending all kinds of presents to my apartment.
I still don't even know where he got my address from. Penny swears up and down she didn't give it to him.
When the first present arrived —an adorable giant stuffed Squirrel with a cute note— and I mean, what are the odds, right?– I immediately texted him to tell him:
Got your present. Stalker much?!
He answered after thirty seconds top.
Carson:
Not a stalker. Determined. Have dinner with me, Mia.
I told himNo, and the stuffies carrying notes kept on coming.
I have an entire stuffy zoo crowding my living room now. Literally, it's like a toy store upchucked kittens and rainbows on every available surface.
Penny says it's romantic as fuck. I told both her and Carson himself that the thing is totally mental.
But I'm clearly outnumbered, and I think all the flowery cuteness is starting to get to me.
I also found out, again from Penny —she's turning into quite a fan of Carson herself— that he and his bandmates have extended their stay at the Mandarin.
And when I texted him to ask why he was staying longer in D.C., his answer was again fast and straightforward and made my heart feel all funny and fluttery.
Carson:
I’m staying for you.
CHAPTER14
Mia
Anna's little harms slacken around my neck, and her head of dark curls gently falls on my shoulder.
I smile to myself. She's out.
My brother texted that he was delayed at the office because of some big case they are working on in a joint effort with the violent gang task force, and he couldn't get the sitter to stay overtime to look after my niece, so I packed up my laptop and books and headed here.
I never miss up on a chance to spend time with her, and she's such a sweet, well-behaved child that I knew that it would be easy to entertain her with a series of Disney movies streaming on the TV while I kept on studying for my next exam after I got some dinner in her.
About twenty minutes ago, she started to flag, and I knew she was ready for bed. We did her nightly routine of bathing and choosing from her collection of PJs —she picked a blue and yellow fleece onesie with a decal over the front showing Moana braving the ocean while standing on a raft. Then we settled on the sofa together, looking through one of her pop-up books for a little while, me reclining with my legs to the side and she sitting on my lap.
