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“You have all the answers, don't you, Ryder?” she asks, tilting her head as she watches me.
“I'm trying,” I respond with a smirk.
“Fine,” she says, wagging her finger at me. “But you were at my house until after midnight last night. Tonight, you have to leave before eleven because I’m exhausted and barely kept my eyes open at work today.”
“Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll take care of you,” I promise. “When are your parents due back?”
“Next week, why?” she asks, looking suspicious. I hate that she always feels the need to be guarded with me. The need to change that lays heavy in my gut.
“I needed to know if I should be on my best behavior or not.”
“You were the one that called a halt to everything last night,” she reminds me.
“Why does that sound like I did something bad—especially when I’m trying to put you first?”
She shakes her head and laughs, but it sounds strained. I walk her to my truck, opening the door before helping her in. When she settles into the seat with a wiggle, I have to bite back a groan. If she only knew how much I wanted to bury myself inside of her, I’m sure she would be more aware of how she moves her body. My cock weeps in protest as I lean over to buckle her in, before holding her face so I can kiss her gently. Finally, I rush around to my side, hopping in—anxious to get her back to her place.
“I'm sorry you had a bad day, Buttons.”
“It wasn't bad, just long and tiring,” she admits with a weary sigh. “What about you? Are you enjoying your time off?”
“Honestly, I was worried about coming home, but thanks to you, it’s been really good.”
“Me?”
“Yeah. You're a gift I wasn't expecting.”
“You’re speaking in riddles. What do you mean, gift?” she asks, her forehead wrinkling in confusion.
“You make my days here better,” I respond honestly.
“Ryder,” she chastises gently. “Your family loves you.”
“I know, but they don’t understand me.”
“What does that mean?” she asks. Maybe it’s my imagination, but she legitimately seems interested. So, I let her have it.
“They want me to live my life on the ranch. They don’t understand that baseball has always been my dream. I may not have made the majors, but I play a game I love, and I make a damn good living while doing it.”
“Have you sat down and talked to your father lately?” she asks, holding up her hand to stop me from interrupting. “I know he was disappointed when you first made the decision, but he's happy since they've expanded the ranch to include cattle. Tucker and your brothers have stepped up and enjoy the ranch life. Tucker is even building his own house on the property.”
The news smacks me in the face causing me to frown. “You seem to know a lot about my family.” It's not a bad thing, I know that. Still, I don’t like her being so close to Tucker and I can’t help feeling that way.
“Your family has been nice to me. I told you that.”
“I can see that,” I respond, some of my jealousy slipping through—despite me trying to lock it down.
“What does that mean?”
“Nothing.” I’m determined not to let anything ruin my night with Tillie—especially myself.
I can't really tell her that I don’t like that my brother wants my girl, and that’s what Tillie is—even if she’s not ready to hear that fact. I can’t, for the life of me, pinpoint the moment everything began spiraling out of my control. I can only say that it all began with seeing Tillie again. I haven't had the feeling of wanting someone like this in so long. So long, in fact, that I was beginning to wonder if I was ever going to feel it again.
I didn't lie to Tillie. When I first left to join River City Roosters—I was a hot damn mess. My pride was in shambles because of how Emily did me. Then, I got told by coach after coach I wasn't ready for the big leagues. Baseball had been my dream for so long and now, it was gone. I was crushed.Completely broken.
To compensate, I lost myself in woman after woman. Hell, I was so bad that I'm lucky my dick didn't fall off. I didn’t know their names most of the time. It wasn’t important. I just needed to feel like a man again. Quite honestly, I was fucking to somehow work through all the shit swirling in my head. I’m not proud of myself—but it’s the damn truth. It is also a history my team doesn't let me forget and earned me a nickname that I didn’t really like. I wish constantly that I could erase my past. It's not who I am—it is just who I needed to be at the time.
“I don't remember you being this weird when we were in school,” Tillie mutters. I bark out a laugh, surprised at her ability to turn it around.
