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16
Aubrey
I wish I could tell you that things got better.
I wish I could tell you that nothing changed between us.
I wish I could tell you a lot of things.
But I couldn’t.
I can’t.
I never regretted the decision to give Dylan my virginity. I never regretted meeting him or being with him, I never regretted anything that ever happened between us, not for one second.
No regrets.
I loved him.
I love him.
The night we made love it changed so many things that I never expected to change. That I didn’t even think would be possible, and that I sure as hell never contemplated for one damn second.
That it could change everything.
Every smile.
Every laugh.
Every touch.
Every. Single. I. Love. You.
For the first time in my life I realized what it was like to truly give yourself to someone. To open your heart to the possibility of love and happiness and everything that comes along with it.
All of the stuff that filled the spaces in between.
The good.
The bad.
The love…
It had been a few days since we made love and I was still riding the high feeling of bliss. Late one night when I was alone, an unfamiliar sound woke me from a dead sleep. I followed the noise down the stairs and found my mom crying to the point she couldn’t breathe.
“Mom?” I called out as if I were a child, standing in the archway that led into the dining room.
She immediately wiped her face, trying to hide the evidence of her meltdown. It was no use her mascara ran everywhere causing black streaks down her face. Nothing could take away the vision of the strong woman crumbling to pieces before my very own eyes.
“I’m fine, honey, go back to bed,” she spoke in between sobs.
“What are you doing home? Shouldn’t you be at the hospital?”
She shook her head. “Aubrey, go to your room please. I’m fine.”
“I’m not leaving until you tell me what’s going on.” I stepped closer, not backing down.
It was then that I noticed the open bottle of wine on the table. My mother never drank and it was blatantly obvious that she was drunk.
