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Whatever it was, I deeply regretted getting physical with my best friend. And it wasn’t much of a fight because neither of us was really hurt, but still. It was probably something we might be able to laugh at it in the future, but definitely not now. Not even close.
Ezra opened the passenger door for me, and I whispered a thank you as I slipped into the seat. He came around the driver’s seat, entered, buckled up, and put his hand on the wheel. As the car quietly came alive, he pulled out of the parking lot first before he finally spoke.
“Wanna explain to me why you and Brenda were pulling each other’s hair on the kitchen floor?”
I winced. “I really would rather not.”
“But you’re going to anyway.” Ezras’s voice didn’t brook any argument, although he let me have my silence for about a minute more as we drove.
Then he asked, “Was it because of him? The ex-boyfriend?”
I sensed a touch of jealousy in his tone, and I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t at least a little happy about it.
“No, it wasn’t about him,” I said. “Well, at least not directly.” While the fight might seem like it started because of Mateo kissing Brenda, it wasn’t about that at all. I meant what I said to Brenda. I didn’t care that she and Mateo were dating. I would have preferred if she had been upfront about it in the first place, but I would have supported their relationship regardless. I had no feelings for Mateo, and I couldn’t claim any ownership over a man I’d broken up with.
So seeing Brenda and Mateo together was fine by me.
But everything she’d said after…the ugly accusations, the bitter words. All of it was from one of the few people I thought cared about me. I wanted to give the excuse that she was drunk, but Brenda had never been an angry or vindictive drunk. There were no huge personality changes while under the influence either, except for a distinctive lack of filter. So drunk Brenda was just sober Brenda’s true inside thoughts, which meant she truly believed all those horrible things about me. I wouldn’t be surprised if it had been on her mind for a long time, and she only just decided to reveal it.
The thought brought a tremendous gloom rather than anger because it could mean our friendship had irrevocably changed forever.
“How much of it did you hear?” I asked Ezra.
“It was hard to hear much of it through the hair ripping and catfighting.”
I blushed again but then caught the littlest hint of a smile at the corner of his lip.
“Haha, very funny,” I said, but I was happy for the added levity. It reduced my embarrassment slightly.
“Honestly, I don’t know what the fight was about,” I admitted. “It started out because Brenda and Mateo were making out and I walked in on them. I didn’t have a problem with it at all, but then Mateo kept apologizing, and Brenda got mad and….” I sighed. “I just needed water. All I wanted was to get some water and some peace and quiet. Then I think I also asked Brenda why she didn’t tell me there was going to be a party, and she said she didn’t have to ask for permission, which is completely fair, and I totally understand. It’s her apartment. I just would have appreciated a heads-up. Anyway, Brenda kept calling me a selfish friend and saying I didn’t give a damn about her, which wasn’t true. I don’t even know where all that came from.”
“Sometimes sober thoughts become drunk words,” Ezra commented.
Yeah, but I wasn’t willing to lay all the blame at Brenda’s feet when I’d antagonized her. And then I probably added fuel to the fire because I was already irritated. It was just strange that she’d never mentioned a party. She usually warned me ahead of time, so I wasn’t sure why she didn’t this time.
But she was right. It was her house, and I couldn’t tell her what to do with it.
“I wasn’t expecting it is all,” I continued explaining to Ezra. “And I didn’t know she’d invite Mateo either. But then she did and also invited a few dozen people who I didn’t know and didn’t tell me anything.” I sighed. “I don’t know. It was just all too much for me at that point, and I lost it.”
Ezra’s face proved he was studying the issue. He didn’t immediately utter judgment, which was good. Because this way, it meant he was considering all angles.
He had every right to be upset or even disappointed with me, but he remained quiet and drove until he was turning the corner of my home.
“One question,” Ezra finally said. “And try not to get offended.”
“Ask away.”
“Why are you friends with Brenda?”
I was taken aback by the question. “What do you mean?”
“Just curious. Because everything you’ve told me so far hasn’t exactly painted a good picture of y’all’s friendship.”
“Wait, hold on.” I may be mad at Brenda today, but it didn’t mean I would let someone talk badly about her over an unfair representation.“That’s because you don’t know our history. Brenda and I go all the way back to high school. We were both outcasts, so we stuck up for each other. Her parents died when she was younger, so a lot of the drinking and partying you see is her way of dealing with it.”
“And you didn’t?”
I shook my head. “Nah. I’ve never really been much of the party type…and drinking, well…because of my dad, I don’t touch that stuff. But when it came to Brenda, I didn’t want her to go alone to a lot of the parties, so I sometimes went with her to keep an eye out for her.”
