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I hide my face in my hands. “Oh my gosh, I’m a total idiot. And I…” I stare up at my best friend, who I love to bits and don’t deserve, and I can’t help being overwhelmed once again by the enormity of what I did to her. Crap, I’m crying now.Uglycrying. A chest-shaking sobs and wailing fest.
Lana’s eyes go wide. “Hey, what’s up?” She gets up from the bed and crouches next to my chair.
“I’m sorry,” I sob. I know I already apologized to Lana ages ago. That she’s already forgiven me. But I feel like I need to say it again, even if words can never truly express the depth of my sorrow. “For everything I did to you. I’m so, so sorry. And I know nothing I’ll ever do or say will make it right, but… I’m…”
“Sorry?” Lana offers with half a smile.
I nod. And I’m not sure who makes the first move, but suddenly we’re standing and hugging while Lana pats my back, murmuring, “It’s okay, everything is going to be okay.”
I lean into her soothing touch for a while until I’m ready to let go. “You shouldn’t be consoling me. Also, you’re going to be a great mom one day.”
Lana laughs it off, before asking, “Is that why you wanted to come over?”
“No.” I blow my nose in a tissue. “I wanted to ask if we’re all set for tomorrow, or if you needed help with any last-minute organizing?”
“No thanks. I had a lot of help from Tucker; we’re good to go. That guy should plan weddings for a living, no matter how much he says he hates it. He’s a natural.”
“Okay.” I dry my eyes on the back of my hands. “I’d better go apologize to my sister before she goes to sleep.”
I pull Lana into another meaning-charged hug, whispering, “Thank you.”
We say good night, and I wander back down to the first floor, ready for one more atoning pilgrimage.
I knock on my sister’s door. When there’s no answer after about a minute, I knock again harder, calling, “Winter? Are you in there?”
I hear rustling on the other side. A piece of furniture gets knocked over. A giggle. More shuffling. More giggles.
Winter opens the door wearing a white robe and looking positively flushed.
“Hi,” she says, all pink cheeks and sparkly eyes. “What’s up?”
“Hey, I’m sorry for snapping at you at dinner.”
“Oh, that, phhf.” She throws her hands down, palms to the ground, in a never-mind gesture. “Don’t worry.”
“But after Thailand, we agreed we’d never go to bed angry, so—” A door slams shut at the other end of the hall, distracting me. It’s kind of awkward to have this conversation standing outside her room. “Hey, do you mind if I come in for a second?”
Winter stares at the floor. “Mmm, actually, this is not a good time.”
When our eyes meet again, the penny drops, as does my jaw. “Oh my gosh, were you having sex?”
“No,” she says, by which she meansnot yet.“Listen, we’re good,” she continues. “I’m sure Lana explained why I picked her to be the maid of honor, and it has nothing to do with me still being mad at you.”
The fact that my sister basically knows how my conversation with Lana went without me needing to tell her is a testament to how symbiotic our trio is.
“Yeah, sorry it took her spelling it out for me to understand.”
“Not at all. Are we cool?”
I nod.
“Great, good night.”
In a blur, she pulls me into a hug, lets go, and, just as quickly, pushes me out of the way and shuts the door in my face.
Okay, then, the please-get-lost-and-let-me-have-sex-with-my-fiancé message is loud and clear.
And I can’t wait for my own sex marathon to start, but I make one last stop before going back to my room. I knock on my parents’ door and pull my mom in for a hug.
