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“Most of the time, I want to be,” I replied with a grin. “Except when you watch the Kardashians.”
“That show is a spiritual experience, and you know it,” she teased.
“That show is scripted drama.”
We sat in silence for a moment, but Grace spoke again. “Thank you for trusting me with your story. I’m sorry people are assholes. And Tony is a dumbass. Do you realize how hot you are? If I thought you’d enjoy it, I’d fuck you right now on this crowded airplane.”
I chuckled while stroking her hair. “I’ve slept with women before, mostly out of morbid curiosity. But I am very much gay. It took me a while to navigate. Nix played a big role in helping me find myself. Before, I thought masculinity and sexuality were moving targets I couldn’t pin down. Now, I’m just myself. No single aspect of my character, preferences, or needs defines me. I’m Alessandro. I like dick. I love a man who’ll never love me back. And my best friend is an annoying chick who likes to watch me get my dick sucked.”
Grace smiled. It was the first time I’d made such a declaration, and maybe I was still reeling from our near-death experience, but I needed to let her know. What I felt for Grace was different than what I felt for Elizabeth. It was right. It wasn’t forced. It was real, raw love. Grace made me feel safe. I could unapologetically be myself with her.
“Don’t you fucking dare make me cry, Alessandro.” She sniffled and looked me right in the eye. “I love you.”
My throat became clogged with emotion. “I love you, too.”
She shook her head and let out a laugh, dissolving the heaviness of our conversation. It felt good to lay our cards out on the table. “The good ones are always gay,” Grace sighed playfully. “I’ll settle for shamelessly cuddling you and feeling up your six pack abs, though. And watching. I like that.” With those words, her nimble fingers settled over my stomach, and she stroked my muscles.
I shook my head. Voyeurism was more Nix’s kink, but I didn’t mind. “Happy to put on a show anytime, Grace.”
There was still unspoken tension between us. I couldn’t help but wonder how long this would last. I knew things would change once we found Nix. I wasn’t sure I could watch them together. I didn’t want to choose between them, but if I did, I was no longer sure who I’d pick.
Our near-death experience made me realize that I needed to spend more time with Grace. I needed to give our friendship an honest shot. I could see us growing closer now that I was being honest with myself about how I felt. She wasn’t just an obligation. She was a tether to the man I loved. A friend. Someone I could trust if I allowed myself to break down the walls I’d built up around myself.
But if Nix picked me, I wasn’t sure I could tell him no, and I would ultimately become another person that abandoned her.
* * *
Sydney, Australia, was chilly and in the throes of their version of winter. The sprawling cosmopolitan city was surrounded by water, and it had beaches that made me want to forget all the stress plaguing us and spend a day resting on the sand. The people had a sense of style all their own, and I caught myself eyeing some of the taller men in tailored suits strolling down the business district. We got a room at the Sofitel hotel that overlooked the water and was surrounded by restaurants that boasted outdoor seating. If we weren’t running for our lives or searching for Nix, it would have made for a nice vacation.
“I need clothes. And a nap,” Grace said while holding my arm as we strolled toward a high-end shopping center. I was lucky enough to have untraceable cards, but I still pulled enough cash out to be safe. I didn’t trust that these people easily believed that we were dead. We just had to get settled and find a plan. “Be honest, does my hair look terrible?”
Yeah. It did. It was just a collection of knots on top of her head. “Nope. It looks great.”
“Liar.”
“Okay, fine,” I began. “It looks like shit, and there are a couple of birds eyeing you. I bet they’re trying to figure out if your hair could be used as a nest. You also have debris coating every strand. You’re scratched and bruised to hell and desperately need a shower.”
“Damn, Alessandro,” she said while scrunching her eyes and pulling away. “I asked about my hair, you didn’t have to do me dirty with everything else.” She shook her head, then led the way into the store, and within minutes she was already picking through pajama sets and yoga pants. “How long do you think we’re staying?” she asked while chewing on her lip.
“I’m not sure yet. I need to get set up in the hotel and set up a secure IP address and do some digging. We might have to move again. Grab enough clothes to be on the run for a while. Whoever these people are, they don’t want us getting close to Nix and have no problem getting rid of us.”
She nodded and rolled her shoulders back. “Got it. Think we can fit a coffee date in there somewhere? I hear Australian coffee is to die for. Maybe brunch?”
I smiled. “I think we can make that happen.”
“Can we have brunch on the beach?” she pressed with a sly smile.
“I’ll see what I can do,” I replied with a chuckle. I liked putting a smile on Grace’s face. I liked seeing her free of worries and full of excitement.
I stayed nearby as she piled clothes over her slender arm. She didn’t bother trying them on. Grace was definitely ready for a nap. I’d followed her shopping before and knew she was meticulous about clothes and style and fit. Right now she was just grabbing the necessities. Once she was done, I grabbed some options of my own and a carry-on suitcase for us, then picked up some toiletries and a first aid kit. We checked out, loaded the bags into our rolling carry-on, and started heading back toward the hotel.
It wasn’t until we were about half a mile from the Sofitel that I noticed him—a man with a ball cap and sweatshirt was following us. He kept slipping behind buildings to avoid being seen. My muscles went tense, and I considered my options. I didn’t want to tell Grace just yet.
“Little One?” I said in a low voice.
“Yeah?” She was humming to herself, likely trying to stay awake. I just hoped she could pull it together long enough to do what needed to be done.
“Someone is following us,” I said in a low voice. “I need you to grab our suitcase and sprint to the hotel. You have the key, right?” I asked while eyeing her. She stumbled over her feet and nodded. Good. “Once you get there, lock the door. If I’m not there in forty-five minutes, I want you to grab your passport and the money, then grab the first flight out of here. Get cleaned up; you might be on the run for a while. I don’t care where your flight goes. Don’t stop moving until you hear from Gavriel.”
