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Research, I remind myself.
So, what do I do? Start reading everything @MidnightLu wrote so far.
14
JACE
“Jace!”Lu shouts from her room, and I rush in, my pulse in my gut, afraid she might not like the new furniture I got her.
Her smile is from ear to ear. My instant relief makes me feel like I just got resuscitated. But before I can say a word, Lu flings herself at me, wrapping her arms around my neck.
“Thank you,” she whispers, her hot breath grazing my skin.
The smell of her peach shampoo tickles my nostrils and chases it with goosebumps. She feels so much smaller and fragile in my arms, but when she pulls away, it’s as if a warm blanket was yanked off me. She has so much heat for such a small human.
A mist of tears shines in her eyes. Yep, it’s official—I made a girl cry.
“Jace…” She bites her bottom lip, her beautiful blue eyes pools of water. “You are amazing.”
And an asshole for spying on her, I want to add. Also for secretly reading her stories.
She goes around the room, touching the shelves and checking the new drawers. There’s impatience in her movements as if she wants to immediately rearrange her room but doesn’t want to seem too eager.
I should probably leave, but I can’t tear my eyes off her.
Lu is this little marvel who combines sass and graceful feminism, #smuttyromance narratives and wholehearted glee about the new shelves. Also, the genuine care when she makes cute colorful outfits for Pushkin. And makes breakfasts for me.
I love her quirky childish streak that makes her sing in the shower, occasionally so loud that I can hear it behind closed doors. Or when she lies on her stomach on her bed, writing on the computer as she wiggles her toes in those adorable colorful socks that she changes every day.
“Youare amazing, Lu,” I say, trying hard not to look flustered at her display of affection.
“And you…you…”
She takes a little breath to say something but stalls, her eyes locking with mine for a little too long.
Long enough for my heart to do a flip and my mind to finish that sentence the way I want to.
Long enough for me to want to touch her again, feel her skin, taste her lips, and inhale her scent.
When you grow up in a group home, you get used to pulling, tugging, and occasional beatings. Thecarelesstouch. Not the affectionate one of a mother, a sister, or a loved one.
The silence between us lasts seconds, but it changes everything and makes me aware of how much my body yearns for her.
I know Lu feels it too.
She flinches. There’s a flicker of surprise in her gaze. A little frown like she just saw me in a different light.
And then it’s gone. She smiles widely and says quietly, “You are incredible.”
That’s it.
One minute, one word, one glance, and I make up my mind—I want to be her man. And not a short-term fling. I want a deep connection, intimacy, making love, making plans, planning the future, imagining a future together.
Everything changes in my mind though we carry on as usual.
Roommates.Friends—the word makes me smile.
I spend the rest of the day studying online and sigh in disappointment when Lu leaves in the evening. She doesn’t come back until after midnight, and when the door to her room closes, I go out onto the terrace and watch the sparkling night downtown across the river, feeling inexplicably happy that Lu is home.
