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"I—" he begins to speak but I shake my head.
"Don’t try to deny it."
"I’m not denying it."
I stare. "You’re not?"
"It’s true, you affect me." He swallows, then draws in a breath. "Since I saw you, my life has changed. By being you, you sparked off changes in me for the better. I’m not sure what it is that you do, but this much I know, when I’m with you, I’m more like the man I was before I was captured. You make me want to become someone you’d be proud of."
My heart slams into my ribcage.What’s happening? What is he saying? How do I begin to react to this? And he’s not denying that he might have purposely forgotten to wear a condom so he could try to impregnate me. A-n-d I do not find that hot. I do not. But the fact that he wanted to be with me bareback, and feel me without any barriers? That’s… Sneaky, underhanded, toxic, and still hot. Oh, god, what am I trying to say to myself here?
"You give me hope for the future. You make me feel, perhaps, not all is lost. That I could get over what happened to me and attempt to live a normal life… As long as you’re with me." He moves toward me, and this time, when he takes my hand in his, I don’t pull away. I can’t pull away.Told ya, he only has to touch me and I’m a goner.
"It’s not fair you have this effect on me." I swallow. "It’s not fair that you can persuade me to see your point of view."
He bends his knees and peers into my eyes. "Do you forgive me?"
"Only if you promise there are no more secrets between us."
59
Knight
"You made her a promise?" Adam shoots me a sideways glance. We’ve jogged our ten miles and cooled down. Now, we’re headed away from the Thames and toward the Shard and my penthouse.
"I didn’t have a choice."
"You made her a promise, knowing you had no intention of keeping it?"
"Not true." I roll my shoulders. "I intend to tell her everything."
"Just not yet."
"Exactly." I glance at him, and yep, he’s wearing a disbelieving look on his face. "What?" I scowl. "It’s true. I intend to come clean with her on everything, as soon as the time is right."
"And when’s that going to be?"
I rub the back of my neck. "Soon."
"I’ve heard that before." He comes to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk. Fucking hell, I don’t want to stop. I want to get away from him and his all-seeing gaze. I want to get back to her. Except—she’s no longer at the penthouse. She told me she preferred to return to the flat with Mira until she sorts things out in her head. She also asked for her old job back, and of course, I agreed. She could have asked for the moon, and I’d have plucked it from the sky and given it to her. She could have asked me to step away from the company, and I would have.A-n-d… Whoa, hold on, what was that?I stumble and manage to right myself before I hit the ground.
"Coming to your senses, eh?" Adam Arsehole smirks as he draws abreast.
"I have no idea what you’re talking about."
"Sure you do. It’s why you’ve gone pale and look like you’re going to be sick any moment."
"I’m not going to be—" My stomach churns, my guts heave, I taste the bile that boils up my throat, and I race over to the bushes that fringe the sidewalk, where I bend over and empty the contents of my stomach. After throwing up what seems to be every last remnant of food inside me, I straighten.
"Here." Adam hands over his bottle of water. I rinse out my mouth then take a sip before splashing some of it on my face.
"Better?" He takes the bottle back from me.
"The fuck is wrong with me?" I rub the back of my neck.
"Nothing’s wrong. You’re rejoining the land of the living is what, my man." He slaps my shoulder.
I shake my head. "Next, you’ll be saying it’s the fact I’m married and halfway to falling in love with her that's bringing about this change?"
