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“Kiera? Is she holding up okay?”
“She’s doing better. Except she misses you almost as much as I do.” He took another step, almost close enough to touch her. The pulse point in her neck raced out of control.
“I miss her,” she admitted.
“Do you miss her older brother?” he asked, smiling again. Dang that dimple.
“Yes, I’ve been longing for Malik to give me something to laugh about.”
He laughed in surprise, and she joined him. It should’ve relieved the tension, but it ramped up quickly when Ray said fiercely, “I’ve longed for your laugh. I dream about it. I dream about you.”
He took that last step, and his strong body overshadowed her. He wasn’t touching her, not yet. She wanted to arch closer so he would, but she stayed pressed back against her desk like a mousy coward.
“What are you doing here?” she demanded. “You had no problem letting me go a week ago.”
“Macey …” He pushed out a heavy breath. “I’m sorry. I was full of guilt and anger at myself for letting T get hurt and for my mum’s death. I thought the world revolved around me and if I let loose, it would all come crashing down. I blamed myself for Mum, and for T, and it turns out, I’m not Superman. And I’m not the center of the universe. After all my guilt and self-sacrifice and control.” He shook his head. “No one was happy. My playing the martyr and letting my pride rule my decisions cost me everything. It cost me you.”
All she could do was stare at him and try to process. She knew he’d taken it all on his own shoulders, and now he was saying it had cost him everything, cost him her. Was she his everything? Her heart raced faster.
“T said I was being stupid and an idiot for letting you walk away.” He smiled briefly again. “Can you ever forgive me for letting you go?”
She swallowed. Of course she could forgive him, but she couldn’t be with him. She wasn’t right for a prince. She wanted to be the most important person to him, but she’d caused his family more heartache they didn’t need—Kiera crying, Tristan burned, Ray with all the angst and torture in his blue eyes.
“You’re not stupid or an idiot,” she managed through her thick throat. She was sad that his pride had cost him everything, and that T had been hurt in the process, but it wasn’t his fault. She hoped he could see that. “You’re honorable, and your family and duties should come first.” She wanted to be as honorable as he was.
“No.” He shook his head and lifted both of his hands, reaching for her. Her eyes widened but she didn’t move away.
His hands went to her hair. He gently worked the elastic out of her hair and tossed it on the desk. Her hair fell around her face, and she pulled in a quick breath.
Ray wasn’t done, though. He ran his fingertips through her hair, massaging her scalp. Tingles went through her. “I love your hair. It’s like silk.”
Macey was going to pass out. Right here and now, if he kept this up.
“What do you mean ‘no’?” she asked.
He stared at her and then he ran his hands through her hair and to her face. He trailed his fingertips along her cheeks, then slid her glasses off and set them on the desk. It felt so right to not have her shield up with him here. “There you are. I missed those deep-brown eyes. I love your eyes.”
Macey’s cells swirled with love for him. She lovedhiseyes.
He framed her face with his palms, his thumb caressing her cheek and then brushing over lower lip. Macey trembled under his touch. “I missed your lips. I love your lips.” His voice got deep and very husky as his gaze dropped to her lips.
Macey drew in a ragged breath, leaning heavily into her desk. She wanted to kiss him more than she wanted oxygen.
“What do you mean ‘no’?” she managed to repeat through a tight throat and trembling lips and the ache for him that was growing every moment.
“My family and my responsibility to my country are second and third on my list, Macey. I have a sacred duty to my family and country. Miraculously, I don’t have to sacrifice everything and suffer without you to do my duty. Sometimes what is right for me is also right for other people.”
Her eyes widened.
“My family and country are both of utmost importance to me. I will fight for them, protect them, give my life for them if needed, but I can also live for myself. It’s time for me to give up what someone recently called ‘my self-importance.’ I’ve done some deep soul searching, and there’s only one person at the top of my list.” He paused, and she swayed. Her hands automatically reached up to cling to his firm biceps, and she leaned into him and not the desk.
“Who?” she whispered.
“The most beautiful computer genius in the world. The woman who is ‘brave, bold, and beautiful’.” He smiled. “The woman I can’t live without.” He paused and bent closer. His breath brushed her lips as he said, “You, Macey. It’s only you for me. You will strengthen me, make me a better man, and together we can protect and serve my family and our kingdom.”
She clung to him and tried to remember to breathe.
“I love you, Macey.”
