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“You loved him.”
“I was a dad, for a bit. Or I thought I was.” He squeezes my arm. “That was the hardest part. It wasn’t losing a woman I loved. It wasn’t even losing a baby. It was losing a—” he trails off.
“Family,” I say softly. “For a while there, you had a family.” A really weird one, where his baby-momma was married to his best friend; but a family all the same.
He doesn’t say anything.
“It’s okay to be upset,” I tell him, tipping my face up to look at him. “It’s cruel that it was taken away from you.”
He shrugs a broad shoulder. “It is what it is.”
“How philosophical.” I poke him. “And, what? That’s why you were so hostile towards me? You thought I was going to come between you all and destroy everything again?”
“Took me decades to reach a point where I made a home. And I thought you were gonna screw with it. I thought you’d hurt Riven and Eli.” He cups my cheek, blue eyes meeting mine. “I’m sorry.”
I consider, then sniff haughtily. “Well. I don’t forgive you.”
He looks down, dropping his hand. “That’s fair.”
“You’re gonna have to make it up to me,” I decide.
“How?”
“Kiss me.”
His eyes darken. “What?”
“Kiss me.”
“No.” His gaze flicks to my mouth. “I told you. I don’t kiss.”
“Why not?”
“It’s unnecessary. When I fuck a girl, it’s about release. Not playing-acting romance.”
“I know you want to. Riven told me. He said that you’d talked about dating me. He said that you agreed.”
Cole snorts. “That doesn’t mean I want to kiss you.”
“That’s kind of exactly what it means.”
He scowls. “You think because I saved you from freezing to death, I want to kiss you? It’s my job to help weak creatures that can’t handle the snow.”
I refuse to be offended by his tone. “You’re doing it again. Pushing me away, because you’re scared. I’m not falling for it again. You can be as grumpy as you want.” I slide closer to him, pressing my body against his, and put my head on his shoulder. “You know why I think you don’t kiss?”
“I’m sure you’re going to tell me.”
“I think you’re just scared of falling for someone. You’re scared of romance, and love.” I reach up and trace a fingertip down his cheekbone. “It’s easier to just have sex, isn’t it? That’s just mindless fucking. But when you look a woman in the face and kiss her, you’re opening yourself up to her. You’re treating her like you really care about her. And that means that she can hurt you.”
“Very astute,” he grinds out.
I press even closer. “But you don’t need to be scared anymore. Johanna has moved on. It’s time you did, too.”
He bristles. “I don’t want to talk about her.”
“Too bad.”
“Excuseme?”
