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“Night, Paisley,” Ben said as he rolled over to face her. She expected some playful jab back, accusing her of snoring too. Instead he just lay there quietly. Watching over her. Waiting until he knew she was all right. Maybe she would survive all of this. Maybe there would be life after that horrible nightmare. And maybe Ben would still be around.
CHAPTER8
BEN
The soft rays of the morning sun filtered through the trees, casting a golden glow over Cinderhill. Ben had woken earlier than Paisley. He’d stayed up to make sure she fell back asleep and didn’t slip back into her nightmare. Standing guard against the monsters that plagued her sleep was a job he felt honored to have. Every newly unfolding detail of what she’d endured made him more determined to do whatever she needed.
The vision of her walking into a room of beheaded rats turned his stomach. He’d seen some shit in his day but he couldn’t imagine her going through that. It would be easy to say he didn’t think there were people in the world who would do such a thing, but where he grew up, that kind of ambush happened. Doing something crazy like that sent a powerful yet unspoken message that could either start or stop a feud. He’d seen dogs poisoned by neighbors because they barked incessantly. Cars keyed for parking crooked. Any perceived slight was grounds for retaliation in South Boston. He wondered if it was the same for Paisley. Had she done something to offend this group and it was the retribution they sought?
When answers didn’t come to him, Ben slipped from their room. He took time alone to gather his thoughts and try to decide if calling Carmen was the right thing to do. He stepped outside, letting the cool air hit his lungs. Rather than being thick with exhaust, the air carried a light mist of fog, slowly lifting with the sunrise.
As he walked along the path, his mind wandered back to his younger days in Boston. Life had been tough for his family, always struggling to make ends meet. They didn't have the luxury of communal support; it always felt like every man for himself. They also didn’t have the serenity that enveloped Cinderhill. The thought crossed his mind—would his brothers have preferred a life like this, surrounded by a caring community and connected to the earth? The better question was whether a place like Cinderhill could contain the O’Malley boys.
Back when they were young and at their most rambunctious, he never knew places like this existed. That there could be this kind of quiet in the world. The city had been their playground, and they thrived in that chaos.
Shaking off the distracting thoughts, Ben reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone. There were rules here at Cinderhill about cell phones. Spotty service. The only thing that would work were bulky satellite phones. There were obviously exceptions, considering security was a concern. But Carmen had been clear not to call in the first week. He was supposed to keep the phone close and be sure to answer if she rang him. But keeping every bit of contact otherwise locked down was the protocol. Ben was about to break that rule.
Once he’d heard the story about the dead rats and realized Paisley hadn’t yet shared the worst of what had happened with him, a little rule breaking felt necessary. He’d take a scolding from Carmen to get Paisley some good news about Doug. She was sinking, and that little bit of information could be enough to keep her afloat.
He dialed Carmen's number and braced for her to fire off some harsh words. He could take it. The line rang, and finally Carmen's voice came through, but her tone was tense not angry. He would have preferred her to be mad. That he could navigate. Whatever kind of apprehension was gripping her was much more concerning.
"Ben, there should be no contact right now.”
“I know. But things are rough here.” He wanted to launch into a conversation about how fragile Paisley’s emotional state was. How the worry for Doug and the trauma of the past eighteen months were crushing her. But Carmen didn’t give him time.
“I told you that Cinderhill would be rustic. You knew that—”
“That’s not what I mean. Arnoldo, the retired detective here, has been talking with Paisley. I’ve had a chance to spend time with her. I didn’t know how bad this stalking was. I still don’t know exactly what she was dealing with. It’s hard for her to talk about.”
“It’s very bad,” Carmen offered quietly. “She’s in grave danger, there is no doubt about it, but we’re working on it.”
“What are the police saying?” Ben knew he sounded demanding, but he was advocating for Paisley and that required some heavy-handedness.
“We’ve talked to all our contacts and gotten ahold of every police report made. They don’t have any concrete leads. We have our hands on every piece of alarming fan mail. Every threat. Phone records. The main issue is how many jurisdictions this crossed. How many police departments brushed it off as just a fanatic movie fan who would end up being harmless. We’re digging our way out of that hole now.”
“This has to happen faster. She wants to get back. She feels like they are robbing her of even more of her life and I agree.”
“We’re going to find the connection that breaks this wide open, we just need time. I understand this might be weighing heavily on Paisley. A big part of your job is to keep her from freaking out while we work. But I specifically asked you not to call. There were reasons for that.”
“She begged me to check in with you today. I felt like it would be good to be able to update her with something.”
“You can’t let her nerves and the overwhelm she’s feeling dictate what you do. That’s the hardest part of the job. Sticking to the process even when the person you’re protecting doesn’t want you to. Can you do that?”
“Cinderhill,” Ben replied knowingly. “You sent King to check in on Bailey because she was an old friend you were worried about. You wanted her pulled out of here kicking and screaming if it came to that. That wasn’t following procedure, right?”
“You’re right. I broke a lot of rules to make that happen, but it turned out I was right. We saved a lot of lives there, and Bailey is safer for it. My perspective, unfortunately, is first-hand experience. I have a gut for this type of thing because I’ve survived it myself. I did go out on a limb with King and Cinderhill, but this situation with Paisley is different. Please trust me on that.”
“I do trust you. I wasn’t trying to cause problems. I just wanted Paisley to get something that might cheer her up, and encourage her to hold on a little longer.”
“These people have eyes everywhere. I don’t know how they’ve been able to keep close tabs on Paisley. There are people in her own network who must have been betraying her. That’s why we're on a radio silence lockdown protocol for the time being. And also because..."
"What? There is something you aren’t telling me.” Ben’s gut sank, feeling like it fell right down to his feet. The crack in Carmen’s voice was a dead giveaway. She was normally unflappable. Nothing really shook her up, but this was obviously something bad.
There was a brief silence on the other end of the line. It stretched on forever. Finally, her voice came through, subdued and filled with regret. "Ben, I can't tell you that Doug is okay because he's not. I didn’t want to relay the news like this but the doctors weren't able to keep him stable, and he died late last night. His body had suffered too much damage from the toxins.”
Shock and horror coursed through Ben's veins, his mind struggling to process the devastating news. He’d never met Doug. This was a story about a stranger, yet he felt like a cannonball blew to his chest. He leaned against a tree for support, his grip tightening around the phone. This wasn't supposed to happen. Carmen was supposed to give him some promising report on Doug that Ben could surprise Paisley with over breakfast.
He took a deep breath, his voice trembling as he asked Carmen, "What should I do? Should I lie to Paisley? I can't imagine breaking this news to her. She’ll be devastated."
