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“You do understand how intrusive these questions are? Before Sway, I dated a director for a year. He directs mostly independent films. That relationship ended when he started dating the lead of his latest film and the paparazzi snapped a picture of them at a dance club making out. It sucked but we weren’t all that serious to begin with. He had a reputation and I wasn’t naïve enough to think I was going to change it. And before you ask, there were two other men, one a costar and the other worked on the crew of a movie I was in. Those relationships were pretty short and ended without fanfare. The costar is happily married with two kids. The crew member lives in Europe and dates a super model. He’s not missing me at all. So there, now you know my whole romantic history. None of them are red flags. None are trying to kill me.”
“They might regret losing you more than you think. You’re not exactly easy to forget. The last guy, has he reached out at all? Maybe he’s still pining for you?”
She shook her head adamantly. “He’s literally one of the best guys ever. Anyone who has worked with him says the same thing. He’s genuine. A heart of gold. Normally he’s incredibly private. Our relationship was harder to keep quiet since we were both in the public eye, which I think added some pressure.”
“That doesn’t seem like someone you’d want to break up with.” Ben cocked a curious brow. “Why didn’t it work out?”
“He was filming for a year in Iceland. We’d only dated about four months. It didn’t make sense to try it long distance. Our careers were taking us in different directions. Our schedules would never allow us to be together as much as we would have liked for a relationship to work. It was mutual and not a problem for either of us.”
“Has he kept in touch?” Ben asked again.
“Are you jealous or something?” She smiled for the first time tonight. “This interrogation is turning a little personal.”
“Men are weird creatures. Wired with some messed-up motivation at times. I’m wondering if he wants to play hero. Maybe he put you in a dangerous position, so he can swoop in and save the day.”
“I’m not sure you are in a position to judge anyone else for playing hero at the moment. You had a chance to get out of here and you stayed. But trust me, that’s not Sway. He doesn’t have a mean bone in his body. Not to mention, he loved Doug. They were fast friends. He wouldn’t do anything to put either of us in danger.”
“A nice guy like that should be calling you to check in once he heard about the threats.”
Paisley shook her head again. "He didn’t know. No one did. I didn't tell anyone outside my team about this. The police suggested keeping it from the news cycles because one of the goals might have been to gain attention. I’m sure Sway tried to reach out after Doug’s death, but I’ve been completely cut off from everyone. Carmen said that was the best way to make sure whoever was on the inside sharing my schedule and whereabouts couldn’t keep doing so.”
Ben's gaze softened as he reached out to wipe away a tear that escaped down Paisley’s cheek. "It must have been terrible facing it alone, not knowing which friend was betraying you.”
She let out a choked sob, the dam of her emotions breaking free. She hadn’t had a moment of peace since it had begun. All the days she dreamed of it being over and returning to her life were gone now. There would be no life to return to without Doug. No matter what happened from this point forward, she would never be able to get back what she’d lost.
"I didn't want to seem weak or attention-seeking. I thought if I ignored it, it would go away. But it only got worse. And Doug paid for that choice."
Ben gently pulled Paisley into his arms, holding tight as her emotions flowed. In a wave of desire, she leaned up and kissed his lips. It wasn’t only desire for him, which she could feel in every fiber of her being, but also a desire to feel anything besides scared and sad. Ben was tentative, his grip loosened as if he were afraid she might disintegrate in his hands. She pressed herself against his muscular chest and kissed him urgently. It was like a thirst that only he could quench. It felt good. A weight lifted from her back. And the absence of it was worse than when it was pressing down on top of her.
In the midst of their passionate kiss, Paisley felt a mix of conflicting emotions. There was a spark of something amazing between them, an electric connection. But guilt washed over her as she realized that Doug would never have the chance to experience moments of joy again.
"I'm so sorry, Ben,” she whispered as she pulled away, her voice breaking. "I don’t deserve to be kissed. Not like that. Not when it feels that good.”
Ben held her tighter. “Close your eyes,” he said firmly. “Sleep. I’ll hold you right here, just get some sleep. I won’t try to tell you how to feel. But I will use every breath in my lungs to convince you this is not your fault. You deserve to be kissed and to feel every bit of joy you can scrape from this terrible life. But for tonight, sleep and I’ll be right here.”
CHAPTER18
BEN
By the following afternoon a sense of restlessness entered their hotel room. They were confined within its walls, unsatisfied with the gas station food, and desperate for some sense of progress. The anticipation of Mick's arrival provided a glimmer of hope, a chance to break free from the claustrophobic grip of fear.
A knock boomed through the quiet room, and Ben approached the door cautiously, his hand lingering on the doorknob for a moment longer than necessary. Doubts crept in, reminding him of the lurking danger that could be waiting on the other side. Taking a deep breath, he uttered the code word Carmen had provided to use before opening the door. Then Mick said his own code word in return. Ben had scoffed at the idea an hour ago when Carmen called with the code information but now he was glad he had it.
Mick stood before him, a gruff figure somewhere in his early forties. His tired eyes scanned the room, his shaved head accentuating his hardened appearance. A dragon tattoo snaked its way across his arm, appearing to devour the large scar by Mick’s wrist. There was an air of unpredictability about him, a reckless aura that suggested he was no stranger to this type of assignment. Ben couldn’t decide if that was a positive or a negative.
Mick wasted no time, launching into a series of questions that cut through the air like sharp knives. The urgency in his voice matched the gravity of their situation. Why were they not in Cinderhill as planned? He needed to see the letter that had been attached to the flowers. He was clearly trying to get a handle on Paisley’s current mental state. Ben handed over the note from the flowers and stood between Paisley and Mick.
Mick's eyes scanned the words, his gaze shifting between Paisley and Ben. A moment of silence settled in the room before he spoke again, his voice tinged with frustration. "On the flight back to the States, I went through every scrap of information Carmen and her team have gathered so far. This is undeniably a deadly situation you're in."
Paisley's eyes welled with tears as Mick's words pierced her heart. “I know that.”
“I’m sorry for the loss of your friend.” He expressed his condolences for her loss, but he followed it with a blunt warning. "If you miss him, you’re certainly on track to see him again soon. Change directions now, or you'll both be dead," he said, his tone unyielding.
Ben couldn't contain his anger, the protective instincts surging through him. He stepped closer, getting in Mick's face. "Don't you dare talk to her like that. She understands what’s on the line. Don’t come in here and make things worse.”
Mick didn't flinch, his unwavering gaze meeting Ben's. "Truth is truth, brother," he said, his voice calm yet firm. "If you can't handle it, you won't make it through this process."
His words stung, a harsh reality Ben couldn't ignore. Mick, true to his nature, seemed unfazed by the potential dangers that lay ahead. “’I’m with you two on this one. I hate the rules most days. I’ve been doing this job a long time and I feel handcuffed by it sometimes. You two are going rogue. Playing a cat and mouse game with some real assholes. I like it. But I’m making sure we’re on the same page.”
