Page 25 of Who I Really Am


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She takes in my face, then laughs some more. Lots more.The girl has nerve, but I’m so swept away by the sweet cadence of the sound that we’re halfway across the parking lot, my hand in hers, before I realize what’s happening. When I do, I dig in my heals and tug. “Lise...”

I sound like a whiny baby, and I’m pretty sure she’s thinking the exact same thing. She comes alongside me, squeezes my arm, and pats my back. “Come on, big guy. You’ve got this.”

I don’t think…I…

I’m inside, ascending a narrow stairway before I know it. We emerge onto the second story, a large, open-air restaurant with sea breezes whipping across the space, the rumble of the waves echoing around us. Eighties top-forty is barely audible above nature’s ensemble. The setting sun streams in from the other direction, and I must admit, no chain restaurant could ever compete with the ambience.

The dining room is only half-filled, and I can’t think of a place less prone to crime, but nonetheless, while Annalise tells our hostess we need a table for two, ocean-facing, I scan my surroundings. Even if I lose my job, I doubt I’ll ever lose this habit.

The woman begins to lead when the call of another has us turning.

“Lise!”

A young woman with auburn hair glistening in the sunlight is waving us over to a table where she sits with a man.

It might be my imagination, but I think I feel Annalise hesitate.

At which point I realize she still has my hand. Not sure how that happened.

The woman’s smile is warm, completely genuine, if I’m any judge of character whatsoever, which of course, I’m awesome at, so it does make me wonder at Annalise’s reluctance. Am I the problem?

I pull away, hoping I’m subtle.

The young woman comes around the table, embracing her. “Oh my goodness, what are you doing here? I thought you were still at school.”

Annalise returns the hug warmly, but there’s strain around her mouth.

“Hey, Maddie. I didn’t know you were back in town already.”

They separate, but Maddie—I now know her name—has each of Annalise’s hands in hers. “Oh, our trip was wonderful. Just got back last night.” Maddie casts a syrupy sweet smile at the man, who’s grinning as obnoxiously as she is. Yeah, I know what they’ve been up to.

But then I also notice the glimmering rock on her finger and the solid platinum band on his. Newlyweds, there is no doubt. Honeymoon, perhaps?

For a moment, lost in my analysis, I lose the thread of conversation, but suddenly I realize all eyes have turned to me.

“Um…this is Marco, my…friend.” Amidst all the turmoil of last night I didn’t hear Annalise stutter and stammer quite so profoundly.

The next thing I know, Maddie and her groom—Brett, I think I heard—are pushing for us to join them for dinner. Obviously a horrible idea, and I wait for Annalise to politely bow out, but the beaming Maddie is a force of nature. A minute later, a waitress is taking our drink order and delivering two more silverware bundles to make it a full house.

I want a beer, but I notice the more innocuous beverages of our new dinner companions and take that as a cue to order iced tea instead. Annalise asks for water with lemon. See, I’m still not convinced she doesn’t have eating issues.

When things settle and I’ve stirred two packets of artificial sweetener into my tea and laid the spoon aside, I decide I’ve been handed an opportunity, a bird’s eye view into Annalise’s life. A chance to see what makes Tripp’s little sister tick. Why this is important to me is not up for discussion.

As they chatter, I peruse the menu. I have been outmaneuvered. While there are both hamburger baskets and chicken meals on the menu, I have this feeling Annalise is not going to let me order either one, at least not without making a scene. Sure enough, she’s keeping an eye on me, and deep into a discussion about her parents’ trip to Europe, she slides her hand across my menu and one of her perfectly manicured fingernails taps the seafood portion of the menu.

Um, no. Bossy thing.

The waitress reappears, takes the friends’ orders first, and before I can open my mouth, Annalise rattles off an order…forme.I open my mouth to rectify the situation, but then I also hear her order a bacon double-cheeseburger with fries. At this point, she leans close. I think she tells me she’ll switch with me if I can’t stand the meal she ordered on my behalf, but the fragrance of her perfume, of her, swirling about me is intoxicating.

Maybe I’ll let her live.

Maybe I’ll even try whatever gross thing she ordered for me.

“Oh,” I hear her say to our waitress, “we’d like an order of the crab cakes, too, please.” She tosses me a smirk. “They also have a spicy version—if you can handle the heat?”

I squint at her, boring my eyes into her fascinating blue ones.Oh, I think you know.I don’t use words to make my point, yet I know by the flush blooming across her cheeks that she gets the message.

Flustered, she retreats to her own space. I’m in the middle of relishing the moment when I become aware of the silence suddenly surrounding me, of two pairs of eyes, eyes other than Annalise’s, on me. On us.

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