Page 8 of Who I Really Am


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“Oh, but it is.”

I look over. “I still don’t get it. Why are youhere?” Establishing his identity hasn’t fully clarified the matter.

He folds his arms over his chest, taking a second to answer. “I was needing to get away for a while. Tripp knew it, talked to your parents, and they offered for me to stay here to…take a break.” He glances over. “They said no one would be home.”

Hey now, this ismyhome—but of course, he’s not to blame for the mix-up. I huff. “Nobody ever tells me anything.” It’s an old gripe between my parents and me. Without a doubt, this is their most egregious omission.

In the distance, behind the house, I barely make out the crash of the waves. I consider walking toward them. Into them. Maybe they’ll cleanse me or maybe they’ll take me under.

I stare at the dirt between my sandals and realize it’s an apropos metaphor.Dirty. The feeling has returned with a vengeance, clawed its way to the surface of my consciousness. For sure, this turn of events has been a giant bucket of cold water. Tomorrow I’ll be grateful to be spared the mistake I was about to make, yet I feel like I’m reaping the consequences without ever getting the reward—however fleeting and futile it would have been. I can admit that now, that I knew from the beginning this could never end well, which only compounds my guilt.

“Lise?”

I can’t look him in the eye. I can’t.

“You’re not going to tell him, are you?”

Marco’s laugh is much more of a choking sound. “Good heavens, no. I value my life. You?”

He sounds genuinely worried, and I can’t say he’s overreacting.Angrydoes not scratch the surface of what Tripp would be. Worse, my brother is kind of a shoot-first-ask-questions-later kind of guy.

I shake my head. “The same.”

My partner in crime blows out a breath, but then he’s quiet, and I think he’s probably watching me. I still can’t look.

“So we’re on the same team then?”

“Team?”

“You know. The enemy of my enemy is my friend, right?” A cute little dimple makes an appearance in his cheek.

I stare, then almost smile. Almost.

The day began with a bang and the fragments of my life have been fluttering down around me ever since. Now, I look around for a hole to crawl up in and die. It’s that bad. My sin is that great. I’ve fallen so far I hardly know myself anymore. How could things get any worse?

Marco clears his throat. “So. Does this mean our date is off?”

CHAPTER 4

Marco

Annalise’s glare scorches me. I was only making light, and I tell her that, but she’s no longer in the mood for my ill attempts at humor. I can’t say I blame her. I don’t always know when to shut up.

Pushing off the truck, I set my hands at my waist. The rain has stopped, and moths and a hundred other flying critters buzz the molded iron sconces shining brightly on either side of the solid oak doors. A single light, the one I flipped on before heading to dinner, glows from inside the giant house, through the leaded glass transom above the grand entrance. The surf crashes in the distance.

Well, it was nice while it lasted.

“What now?” I ask as much to myself as her. I know I can’t stay.

Slowly, she stands but looks everywhere except at me. I think she’s embarrassed. She’s huddled in her own arms, so for sure the little seductress has left the building. I want to say something to make it better, but I’m at a loss for words, and truthfully, a part of me wants her to feel shame if it will keep her from doing this kind of thing again. Her brother is my partner, my friend. By default, I think that makes her my friend, too.

I don’t have a ton of friends, especially lately, but I would never, ever, under any circumstance whatsoever, want any friend of mine picking up a random stranger and taking him home. Good heavens, what was she thinking!

The hypocrisy of my thoughts doesn’t escape me. I’m not particularly proud of myself either, but it’s easier to focus on her at the moment.

I walk back to the driver’s side, its door still swung open.

“What are you doing?” She watches my every move through the open doors.

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