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CHAPTER4
Lily
My heart hurts. Hurts like it’s been ripped out and stomped on. I curl up in my window seat in my room and watch them leave, savoring my last glimpse of Sam.
He’s tall and strong. I feel tears hit my eyes but I push them back. I won’t cry. I can’t do that.
If I start I won’t stop. And it’s not like we dated or anything. I just felt more for that man than I’ve ever felt for any other man before.
I lay my head on the window, feeling the cool glass on my heated skin. I lift my hand and settle it on the pane. Like he almost feels me, Sam looks up, his eyes hidden behind mirrored sunglasses.
I can’t see the quicksilver in his gaze. But it haunts me.
Then he turns to leave and my heart breaks even a little more. I sigh and stand up, turning back to my bed.
I sink down into the soft bedding and let it cradle me, comfort me. It’s amazing how much soft fabrics can help soothe your soul. But it’s not going to soothe this bone-deep hurt. Like he didn’t want me.
I thought I made it plain that I liked him. Hell, I practically threw myself at him.
And all he did was make it plain that he thought I was a child that needed saving from my own feelings.
If I wasn’t so heartbroken, I’d probably be really pissed.
My cell phone rings and I pick it up, sniffling. “Hello?”
“Lil…what the hell? Are you alright? Your dad messing with you again?”
Snorting, I wipe at my tears. “Nope. Didn’t even come home. I heard the guys working here today tell him he couldn’t drive on the new driveway so I guess he just figured he wouldn’t come home.”
“Isn’t your mom gone too?”
“Yeah. So what? I’m an adult. I can stay home alone without a babysitter.”
“I know that. But I thought maybe you’d want to go out tonight since you’re alone. We could have a little fun without anybody knowing,” she teases.
“I don’t care about that shit. I…”. My voice cracks and I sob once. Pushing it all back down.
“What the hell? Did one of those guys out there mess with you? Gimme a name and I’ll fuck him up.”
I have to smile. Gemma’s been my best friend forever and I love her like the sister I never had.
I’ve been lonely my whole life. My mom and dad were too wrapped up in their own lives to give a shit about me unless it was to their advantage. School play? Nope.
But Christmas party and dressing up your kid like a little barbie doll? Yeah, they’re all in for that.
“It’s nothing like that. Hell, he wouldn’t even touch me. Even though I practically begged him to.”
“Whoa, whoa! I gotta hear this story! What was going on out at your place today?”
So I start at the beginning. From meeting Sam to taking him food and having him basically pat me on the head and tell me to go take a nap like a little kid.
She huffs. “Men! They’re all idiots. Why can’t they just keep up instead of us having to draw diagrams for them?”
I snort out a laugh that almost turns into a sob. “Thanks, babe! You always know how to make me feel better.”
“How badly do you want to get this guy?” She says and I can hear the tease in her voice. She’s about to suggest something outrageous.
“What are you thinking?”
