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“Sometimes we find out who we truly are when we’re at our worst.” He stared pointedly at me.
“Oh, fuck you! Don’t give me that bullshit. I saw the way you reacted when he walked away. It’s tearing you apart as much as it is me.”
“What do you want me to do? Scream, yell, hit shit? I’m at work.”
I leaned forward, getting closer, goading him. “Yeah. I do. At least then I’d know you’re processing. Not this calm facade you’re putting on right now.”
His dark eyes narrowed. Eyes I wondered if I could get lost in and no one would be able to find me. He leaned forward as well, putting our faces mere inches apart. “I’m not going to lose my shit at work. You want to, that’s fine. I can’t. Someone has to keep it together around here.”
“Anything else you’d like to criticize me for? Like I don’t have enough people already doing that. Go back to your desk, Peyton.”
I went to stand but a strong hand gripped the front of my throat, startling a gasp from me. I could still breathe fine. If Peyton wanted to hurt me, he could, yet he wasn’t.
“Do you know how badly I want to put you on your knees to give your mouth something to do beside run incessantly?”
“Do it. I dare you.” I was playing with fire. I shouldn’t have said it to him, but he shouldn’t have made the suggestion. We were at work. This was a bad idea. I certainly had no clue how to suck a dick. Dominic was still outside and wouldn’t let anyone in. At least I hoped he was still there.
My eyes drifted to the door out of instinct, as if thinking about him would conjure him up. What would it be like when he was gone? What the hell was I going to do with a new assistant? I didn’t want anyone else. Just him.
Or was it more than that? More than work? I basically told Peyton to choke me with his dick. Would I even want that without Dominic here, without his hands or mouth on me?
When I focused on Peyton again, his features were softer. His hand around my throat was loose, his thumb rubbing gently over my skin.
“Fix it, Pey,” I whispered brokenly.
“I can’t. We have to let him do what he wants.”
“I need him.”
“How?” Why did he have to ask me that?
I tried to move away but his grip tightened. I wasn’t going anywhere until he wanted me to. “I don’t know.”
“I think you do, but you’re too scared to voice it. That’s fine. You take all the time you want.”
“What if he…”
“Dom’s changing jobs, nothing more. You heard him. We know where he lives and where he dances. I also know where he goes by the location of his phone.”
I rolled my eyes. “Of course, you do.”
“If they work closely with you, I know everything about them.”
“I’m surprised he lets you get away with tracking him.”
“I think he secretly likes that I can, even if I never have. I told him I’d remove it and he said to keep it.”
A knock sounded on the door. Peyton and I pulled apart. He put the chair back to where it was and kept a reasonable distance between us. His gaze dropped to my neck. I wondered if it was red from having his hand there. I shivered at the thought. I kind of liked the idea of Peyton claiming me again. It was like when we were at the club, and he came all over me. He claimed me then too and I wanted it. Fuck, I wanted it so much. Did I also want more than just sex?
“Come in!” I called.
Dominic stuck his head in. “What do you want for lunch? I’m going to run out.”
“Take Greer with you,” Peyton said without turning to look at him.
“Um, no. Perry?”
“Whatever you’re in the mood for, I’ll eat.” It was another way Dominic took care of me that I took advantage of. Another way he was always there for me. What had I given back to him, and I wasn’t referring to money? That only went so far. Dominic needed more.
