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Fuck me, I was so in love with them. And they loved me. They loved each other. It was surreal when I stopped to think about it. How three men who shouldn’t fit did, and not only that but were in love.

JJ and Dexen were easy. They knew what it felt like to be in love with each other. But that was years ago. The feelings never died. They didn’t fall out of love. They didn’t think their relationship was at its natural end or that they were incompatible. JJ didn’t want Dexen to kill for him. And Dexen did it anyway. It was pretty simple, but it was a deal-breaker for JJ back then.

Would they have gotten past it if I wasn’t in the picture?

Would they have been brought together in another way than when Dominic was strung up in JJ’s shop, forcing Dexen and JJ into the same room again?

I didn’t have the answers and didn’t need them. Because those two men were mine.

There hadn’t been a single moment when I thought they only wanted each other. Or they didn’t feel for me what they did for one another. I didn’t love one of them more. I saw different things in them. Different ways they needed me.

JJ was all rough and jagged edges. He gave as much as he got. But he needed someone to smooth those edges. To take him in hand and show him life wasn’t just violence. That there was softness in the world still. People who’d rather love than fight. Who’d rather thrive than bring others down. He needed an optimist. Enter me.

Dexen was all business. He didn’t allow time for anything or anyone else before us. After what he went through with JJ, he locked that part of himself down. He thought his heart was gone, ripped from his chest. It wasn’t. It was in hiding, protecting itself, waiting for the right time to let hope in again. He didn’t want to feel something for me, yet I got under his skin. I showed him I wasn’t going anywhere.

When the three of us came together, it wasn’t all hearts and happiness. We had challenges, like getting Dexen to realize we weren’t going anywhere. He was the protector who needed the right men to pull him in, to hold him with gentle hands. JJ needed us to prove to him what Dexen did back then wasn’t done to piss him off or deliberately hurt him. It was done out of love. JJ had to learn to trust again, but this time with open communication.

As for me, I didn’t need a lot. Love. Kindness. Someone to see me as something other than an object of desire. JJ and Dexen saw me, really looked inside and saw who I was. Sure, the sex was phenomenal but that wasn’t all we were.

Together, we were even, balanced.

Together, we were cared for.

Together, we wereloved.

People would stare like they did when we went on our date. They would hate like they did in front of JJ’s shop when we were about to leave on his bike. Some would be curious and smile when they glanced our way. Others would understand and be happy for us, supportive. They would see three men in love and think nothing more than good for them.

Was this what happened to me when there was no one in the house to draw my attention? I turned introspective and thought about what had taken place since JJ came into my office that day and we talked about sex?

My phone vibrated on the counter. I lifted it and read the texts which came in one after the other.

JJ: Are you jerking off without us, Greer?

Dexen: If you are, take a picture.

JJ: Or a video.

Dexen: We’re not picky.

JJ: We’ll take whatever you want to send us.

Dexen: We shouldn’t have gone to work on a Saturday.

JJ: Not when Dom, Pey, and Junior are at the penthouse, giving us the weekend and the fortress to ourselves.

Dexen: We’re stupid men.

JJ: Really fucking stupid.

Dexen: I have a meeting in a few then I’ll try and get out of here.

JJ: I’m closing the shop. I already sent everyone home. I’ll go blow Greer for the both of us.

Dexen: I want a video of that too.

JJ: We should get a camera and set it up so when one of us can’t be there, we can still feel like we are.

Dexen: If we do that, I’ll be jerking off at my desk all day.

Source: www.allfreenovel.com
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