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His son had pulled Rian out of the deepest pits of despair, giving him the courage and determination to slowly reclaim his sanity and autonomy. Rian’s love for Brandon had been instant, urgent, and purely visceral. He adores his child with every cell of his body. To explain that to complete strangers seems like he is constantly forced to bare all, for the purpose of justifying loving his own child.
Why? Why does he need to prove time and time again, that the love he has for Bran is pure?
He had been reluctant to volunteer the information to Mr. Duncan as the elderly gentleman seemed quite nice and frankly, he missed casual adult interaction. But when the conversation went there, as it always did, Rian couldn't bring himself to lie.
He sighed and said as casually as possible, “Brandon is my nephew by marriage. His mother passed away a week after he was born. I adopted him legally shortly after. We don't know who the father is.” He took a deep breath and added, “My son means everything to me. I can’t imagine my life without him anymore. Truth be told, Bran has given me the best moments of my life, thus far. I am honored to be his dad.”
Mr. Duncan had looked at him thoughtfully, as Ri squirmed anxiously, expecting the usual negativity.
“That must have been...” his voice trailed off as Bran was distracting him with his adorable giggles, grabbing onto the corners of his navy-blue cashmere cardigan. He reached over to touch the texture of Mr. Duncan’s hair – he had a much darker complexion than Bran.
Rian’s little boy had clocked on to the similarity nonetheless and was curiously investigating his facial features, his shortly cropped graying hair, and the wrinkles around his eyes. The moment was quiet and beautiful.
The elderly gentleman didn’t seem to mind his exploration and stood still, giving Bran all the freedom to become familiar with him. Bran felt comfortable enough to cuddle up to him after. Mr. Duncan had exhaled slowly, his breathing a bit shaky. It was a beautiful moment.
“It was the right thing to do,” Rian murmured, smiling softly.
Mr. Duncan huffed, then gently pried Bran’s hand away from his mouth. Ri chuckled, as he knew this was his fault – Bran giving dental exams to strangers. Rian had been checking for his first baby teeth so often, the little boy had adopted the behavior as his own get-to-know-you-better tactic.
“Don't downplay it,” Mr. Duncan said. “You obviously love your son very much. I can tell it's no hardship to give him a good home.”
Rian stiffened, but then, as practiced many times, forced a smile. “I hope so.”
His new friend had given him a curious look but had left it at that and didn't ask further questions. Rian knew he wasn’t fooling anyone. He was the only one spotted out and about with Brandon and that was just fine really. Hardly anyone bothered asking about Harris when it came down to parenting Brandon. It was glaringly obvious that his husband wasn't actually taking part in raising Bran.
Rian wasn’t going to explain how relieved he was about that. The conversation had died away. Mr. Duncan had been kind and understanding moving on to other topics.
His company was always comforting. Meeting up had become something of a regular activity Rian greatly appreciated. Mr. Duncan had so many stories about his youth in the south, about his gardening adventures and Coco’s mischievous ways. It was pleasant to listen to him talk about settling into retirement and trying to keep up with Coco.
The dog had been a very much unwanted, at first, gift from his nephew George. She had been Mr. Duncan’s first-ever pet.
Their shaky relationship had started off on the wrong foot, with Coco chewing up a couple of Mr. Duncan’s prised bonsai trees. She’d become very ill. After nursing her back to life and spending countless hours at the veterinary clinic hoping for the best outcome, Mr. Duncan had come to terms with the fact that Coco while wild and awfully naughty, was a bright ray of sunshine he’d miss terribly, should she be ever hurt again.
Today Mr. Duncan announces he has some exciting news. Rian listens to him talk about his upcoming plans to go on a pet-friendly cruise in a few months' time. These days he doesn’t do anything if he couldn’t take Coco along.
While normally, their conversations bring Rian comfort, today everything just feels off. Rian couldn’t focus. Their chat dies out uncomfortably.
Once they settle into silence, his thoughts inevitably drift off to Stephanie. Rian keeps looking around. He’s hoping Stephanie might show up. He knows it’s unlikely, but he isn’t sure what he is supposed to do. Should he call her again to check on her? He figures if she wanted to reach out, she would, and going for a second drive-by seems a bit stalkerish. And yet…he still feels uneasy about yesterday’s incident.
Mr. Duncan notices him getting fidgety, as Rian keeps scanning the park lanes, clearly looking for someone. “Are you meeting a friend?”
“I don’t think so,” Rian mutters, distractedly.
When Mr. Duncan gives him a confused look, Rian tells him about the confrontation between Stephanie and Colton. He calls himself out for acting like aBethany-Anneright now and blabbering about Stephanie’s business to someone he has only known for a short while, a stranger really.
In the end, he tells himself it’s okay. At the very least he hasn’t used any names in the retelling of the story. Besides, Mr. Duncan seems rather kind and sympathetic. Maybe he could advise him what he is or isn’t supposed to do, without alienating Stephanie and losing her friendship.
After he gives him a fairly detailed version of yesterday’s events, Mr. Duncan seems quite concerned. “Do you think your friend is okay?”
Rian shakes his head. “I don’t know what to think anymore. I thought about calling. It doesn’t seem enough. I don’t want to cause more problems. I…I want to go over there and check on her, but…well, she hasn’t…I don’t know if she even wants my help.” He sighs, looking down at his son trying to shimmy away from the blanket and get a fist full of the little Maltese dog. He gently catches him under the arms and stands him upright so his little feet could rest on his thighs. Rian kisses Bran’s cute little nose, eliciting a giggle from his son.
He murmurs, to himself mostly, not certain if he actually wants Mr. Duncan to hear him, “Not sure I could even help her all that much. I’m the last person that has the right to be meddling in people’s relationships. I’m not in the position of giving life advice.” Rian’s throat tightens as he finally confesses, “What help could I be? To be honest with you Mr. Duncan, I’m really embarrassed. The truth is, I don’t know if I’m imagining her distress or if I’m projecting my own misery onto her situation.”
That last statement hangs heavy in the air between them. Rian couldn’t bring himself to meet Mr. Duncan’s eyes, even though he feels the elderly man is completely focused on him.
“Ryan, listen… if your friend needs legal help…or if you know anyone else that might need representation…remember my nephew, George? He is a lawyer. A very capable one. He normally works with big corporative clients, but he is well-versed in cases where domestic violence is concerned. It’s part of his charity work. He donates his time and expertise to people who otherwise wouldn’t be able to afford representation. He is very discreet and respectful. I am certain he won’t mind meeting you…or your friend to discuss things.” Rian doesn’t know what to say. Is it really that easy? Could George actually help Steph? Help him?
Mr. Duncan pulls a small notebook from his pocket and quickly jolts George’s information down. He tears the page carefully and hands it over to Rian.
