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But she couldn’t ask him to do that. She shook her head, her heart in her throat. “No.”
“I’m sorry.” He leaned against the beam of wood behind her, his face just inches from hers. “I wish I could do more.”
“I know the feeling.”
He cupped her face. “You are amazing, you know that? I still can’t believe you figured out that woman was a reporter and outed her. She was ready to rip my mask off. She might have succeeded if you hadn’t stopped her.”
Guilt made her stomach fill with acid. The only reason she pegged the tabloid reporter is because she’d used the same tactics herself. But she didn’t want to keep talking about her “heroics.” She didn’t feel like a hero. She felt like a traitor.
“Not to change the subject, but can I ask you a question?”
He took a minute to study her before speaking. “Of course.”
Before she could take some time to think, words began spilling out of her. “If you had two people you cared about, one who was hurting and in pain, and the other one who could help but it would put them in a bad position, would you ask the second one to help, even if it meant you could be causing them misery?”
After that string of nonsense was out, she pressed her lips together. What was she doing, exactly? Trying to get his permission to ruin his life?
He squinted at her. “Is this about your father?”
“Never mind,” she said, waving her hand. It was stupid to even bring up. Why did she do that? She couldn’t talk about her predicament with Jalen. And she certainly couldn’t get his permission like this.
“No, I’m trying to understand.”
“Forget it.” She didn’t want him to understand. It was a mistake. She closed the distance between them, pressing her lips to his. He responded, taking command of the kiss. She wrapped her arms around his neck, and he took a step forward, her back pressing against the wooden beam that was behind her.
His lips were tender. Seeking—exploring—sending waves of desire through her. She imagined Jalen before her, without his mask hiding his identity. His strong cheekbones. His silky, blond hair falling to his forehead. Her fingers grazed over his skull cap and mask, probing to find the definition of his face. For some reason, she needed confirmation that she was right.
He made a small moaning sound as her fingers grazed over his skin below his mask. It was Jalen, she was sure of it. He’d made the same sound that first day, when he’d taken a bite of the shrimp. Her heartbeat picked up.
“Riley,” he whispered, his lips pulled back just enough so he could speak.
“What?” she whispered back.
“You’re making it very hard for me to resist you.”
She rested her forearms on his shoulders, her fingers playing with the tie on the back of his skull cap. “Why do you have to resist me?”
“Because. The more we do this…” He kissed her. Tingles erupted over her skin. “The more I feel guilty for not being myself with you. The more I want to—”
She put a finger on his lips to stop him from saying it. She couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t move. Would he reveal himself as Jalen to her? Was he saying that’s what he wanted to do? If he did that, she would feel even worse handing in a story about him to her boss. It would be obvious who the rat was. Could she hurt him like that? Kiss him, and then stab him in the back?
Panic rose in her, and she pushed him back. “Oh, my goodness. I totally forgot. I have to call the insurance company and tell them that father went into the hospital.” She patted her hair back into her bun. Not that it was coming out. She needed something to do to cover up the lie. “How could I have forgotten that?”
“Go ahead and call.”
“The uh…number is in my room back at the resort. But it’s okay. You stay and enjoy the park. I have to get the laundry out of the dryer anyway. I’ll put it in your room after I fold it.” She backed away from him. “Sorry. I don’t know how I could have forgotten to call.”
She rushed down the gazebo steps and onto the sidewalk, her heart beating against the inside of her ribcage. She couldn’t let him reveal himself to her. Not now. She wasn’t ready to face it. If she knew for sure, she would have to write the article, and she didn’t want to. Not yet. She had to think about what she was going to do.
Chapter 20
Jalen watched as Riley practically ran to the resort. Had he scared her off? He was only trying to be honest with her. And if he were being completely honest with himself, he was falling in love with Riley.
His heart nearly burst at the thought. He was in love. But how could she love him back, if he wasn’t being honest with her? In order for them to have a chance at a real relationship, he had to take off his mask and show her his real self. His scars and all. He couldn’t pretend he was someone else any longer. It was time for him to let her know.
However, he had no idea how he would say it. He was nervous and unsure, but he didn’t want to back away from it anymore. If he were to continue having a relationship with Riley, he had to let her know who he was. Even if it meant losing her.
But she’d stopped him mid-sentence. She hadn’t let him tell her what he was feeling. Was she not feeling the same? Or did she simply remember a call she had to make?
