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“How has this come between you and your sisters for this long? They can’t possibly blame you for this. It’s his fault and his alone. Surely they see that.”
Something I can’t decipher passes through her features. It’s enough to make me dig further. “They don’t blame you, do they?”
She lifts her chin, spine stiffening. “They say they don’t, but they must.”
There’s more to this story, but she’s already gone through so much tonight. I know how hard it was for her to admit this. For now, I’ll let it go and simply hold her, stroking her supple skin and kissing her forehead.
After a while, I muse, “All this time, I thought your need to dig up intel was because of your time at the CIA.”
“It’s easier to blame that, but it was mostly this. The company saw it in me and exploited it.” Her eyes glaze over as thoughtfulness settles across her features. “The company is exceedingly skilled at finding people who will thrive in a world of deception. My hack into a Fortune 500 company’s system caught the attention of a CIA recruiter. I guess they figured if I had the skills and the gumption to pull that shit off, I’d have no problem getting my hands dirty for the country. It’s almost as if they preyed on me.”
Her mouth slams shut, and she shakes her head. “That sounds stupid. I’m sorry. But sometimes I think if I hadn’t been so desperate to hide from what I’d done by running to the CIA, then I’d have faced what happened and made amends. My relationship with my family wouldn’t be forever severed. And best of all, I wouldn’t have spent the last decade serving my inner pimp.”
“Inner pimp?”
Her mood slowly brightens, and she palms her forehead. “Is this when you learn how crazy I am?”
I stay quiet, waiting her out until she caves.
“For years, I’ve internally joked that I have a pimp inside me. Or I’m the pimp, and intel is my whore.”
My chuckle starts slow and low, but I’m laughing outright before I know it. She ends up snickering along with me until her cheeks turn as red as her hair. There’s something so freeing about a tension-breaking laugh.
“I told you I was crazy.”
“So you’ve been bribing your pimp with intel for years and years. Damn, that’s hilarious.”
Sadness befalls her sweet face.
“What?” I ask.
“You didn’t think it was hilarious when the pimp sent me after you.”
My gaze falls on my half-eaten dessert. “No, I didn’t. I’m making peace with it. A week or two ago, Shep and I had a chat. He helped me put it into perspective. Considering your past of always looking over your shoulder and now learning about your sister, I understand why you had to find out more about me.”
“I’m so sorry for lying to you, Cal. And I’m grateful for the second chance. I might not deserve it, but I won’t turn it away either.” She exhales, her lips sputtering comically. “I only hope the others are as forgiving. I can’t offer them a bjology like I did with you.” Her grin reappears.
My stomach flip-flops. “Huh? Others?”
“Yes. I’ve decided to come clean. With everyone.”
I must be missing something.
“Although we’re speaking the same language, something’s getting lost in translation,” I joke nervously. “What others?”
Her face blanches, lips tugging downward. “You didn’t know?”
After she takes in my confused expression, her entire frame sags. “I knew it. There were flickers of this in the back of my dumb mind. A few times, I thought you had the wrong impression. I should have brought this up sooner, but then you’d get that sullen look on your face, and your puppy dog eyes would get all sad. So I avoided it. Deep down, I’m a coward. I’m so—”
I press my index finger to her mouth to halt her frantic rambling. “Mia, stop. What are you talking about?”
“Cal, you aren’t the only one at Redleg I investigated. I collected intel on everyone there. Hell, if my laptop hadn’t died when it did, I would have started on the janitorial contractors. Once I got up to get the power cord, I stopped the insanity.”
“What did you dig up?”
“Anything I could find. Credit reports, family members, social media, employment history, military service records, and a dozen other things.”
“Medical records?”
