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“But the baby? Is it okay? Are you okay? You shouldn’t have left in a hurry, Carli. Your health is more important.”
Carli huffs, but she doesn't look angry. “The baby is fine, and the doctor discharged me this morning. If you’d opened my messages or answered my calls, you would have known.”
I flinch. After the almost three-hour meeting with Danika and the pack, I went home and crashed. I felt so much worse when I woke up this morning, weighed down with dread and hopelessness. With all those mixed emotions, I accidentally left my phone at home.
“I’m sorry.” I rub my face. “I don’t have my phone with me, and I’ve been sitting at this bar, trying to think for hours.”
Carli nods at the liquor in front of me. “You thought that would help?”
“In some ways,” I shrug. “Now that you’re here, I feel much better.”
It’s the truth. The weight I’ve been carrying around since morning has lightened. That's what Carli always does, she gives me hope no matter what situation I’m in. I want to do better for her, because of her.
“I got Danika to tell me what happened. About Devon’s challenge.”
I breathe in, holding the air in my chest and waiting till she cries or hits me or something. Carli punches my arm gently, but the corners of her lips tip up. “You goddamn fool! When I said get us out of this, this isn't what I meant.” Her face settles into more somber lines. “But I’m not here to be mad at you, I know you didn't have a choice.”
“I’m still sorry,” I frown sadly.
“And you’re drunk,” she replies sassily.
Danika chooses that moment to slide in front of us, dishcloth over her shoulder. “Carli, good to see you back home,” she grins.
Home. What a weird word. I used to think home was Rockport. Where my pack is, where Nanna is, where the beach house is. I never thought home could be a person. All those hours I spent with Carli in her apartment, in a town I’ve never once set foot in, I felt at home there. Now, at this bar I’m sitting trying to get sober, Carli’s thigh pressing hard against my own, I feel at home.
It’s not Rockport, it’s her.
Carli looks at me, smiles and says, “Yeah, it’s actually good to be back home.”
“Do you want some water?” Danika asks me, and I nod, not taking my eyes off the girl I’m so helplessly in love with.
“I love you,” I slur, my head falling on her shoulder.
Carli slides her fingers through my hair. “I love you too.”
Danika brings me my water, which I drink until I feel a little more sober. Carli and I sit, listening to the slow bar music, and enjoying each other’s silence. We don’t have much to talk about…there’s so much we want to say, but we’re wary of saying it. I want to tell her I’m so scared to go to battle. If I didn't have her, and didn't have a family coming on the way, I would have fought Devon the next morning if I could. Now I have too much to lose, so much I’m afraid to lose. I keep thinking, what if I fail.
What if Devon wins…
Gritting my teeth, I think no way in hell will I die and let Carli suffer the grief. I’ll be there when my child is born and when he or she will take their first steps. I won’t miss a single milestone if I can help it. Devon will have to lose.
“Let’s dance,” I tell Carli, taking her hand in mine.
I pull her to the middle of the bar, where most people are swaying their hips to the beat of the song. Placing my palm on her waist, I pull her body flush against my chest, feeling her tight nipples brush over my skin teasingly. Carli winks up at me as she winds her arms around my neck. I kiss her cheek and we move, slow and soft, with intimacy.
“I was thinking—”
“Carli!” Tax interrupts me, pushing through the sea of people with a goofy grin on his face.
I groan, shooting a glare his way but Tax ignores me. He hugs Carli, tugging her away from my arms as he spins her around.
“You’re back!”
Carli laughs. “I am!”
A few more of my pack members fill the space around us. They must have been here when Carli first came. I was so out of it, I didn't even notice. One by one they make small talk with Carli. Her cheeks flush with happiness, a smile splitting her face. The women ask about the baby, and some of the men ask if they can feel it kick. I growl at them and they immediately back away. Carli leans back against me while keeping conversation, and I wrap an arm around her stomach.
“When are you due?”
