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“Why not?” She tossed her hands in the air. “You’re set for life. You don’t need more money for crying out loud. Leah is fine, your mom is fine. You can find another job, and even if it takes a year or two, so what? Do you think it’s better to stay in a job that makes you justify doing terrible things or get out before it poisons you?”
“It’s not poisoning me.”
“If you think this stuff is okay, then it is absolutely poisoning you.” She could hear the panic in her voice. Keatoncouldn’tend up like her parents—money hungry, with no care for anyone but themselves. She couldn’t bear it. “You need to quit.”
“Thomas...” Keaton shook his head. “He really helped me when I needed it. He helped me start my career and protected me from people like Asher Benson. After Ellery died, he was there for me. He’s...”
She could hear the pain and conflict in his voice.
“I never had a proper father.” He swallowed. “I never had someone to look up to, someone who would give me advice and actually give a shit about where I ended up in life. My stepdad thought I was worthless from day one. My real dad...”
August didn’t know much about Keaton’s biological father, only that he’d taken off while Keaton and Leah were young. She suspected there were substance abuse issues, based on a few cryptic things Keaton had said over the years, but she’d never wanted to pry since it was clearly a painful topic.
“My real dad told me when I was five years old that he wished I’d never been born.”
August had a sharp intake of breath. “I’m so sorry.”
“Thomas is the only man who ever stood by me.” He looked down. “Doesn’t that count for something? My job is... Some days it’s all I have.”
The words took the wind out of her sails and dropped the temperature in her blood. He wasn’t looking at her. Instead, he’d reached for his room key and held it over the lock. It clicked and he pushed the door open, going inside. She followed him, letting the door shut quietly behind them. Keaton wandered to the window with his arms folded over his chest, like he was trying to shield himself from the world.
“How can you say that?” she said. “You haveplenty.”
He didn’t reply.
“Is that all you think life is worth? Working to get more financial security for your mom and sister?” They’d never spoken about this before. In fact, she’d wager that they’d never spoken aboutanythingso deep before. “Or is it something else?”
“I promised Ellery I’d get to the top,” he said quietly. “I’d get there because it’s what she wanted us to do, together. And since she can’t, I feel like it’s my responsibility to fulfill that dream. When I get my name on the wall, then I know I’ll have reached the top.”
“Mmm. And you climbed a mountain you don’t even like.” She nodded. “Smart.”
When he turned, she’d expected him to look angry. Or defensive. Or prepared to argue his side. Instead, all she saw was defeat in his green eyes. It made her want to pull him into her arms and kiss him until that sad, bleak look went away.
“You deserve to do something that fulfills you, Keaton,” she said softly. “I know you’re not a person who wants to hurt people. But youarehurting people, doing this work. At least, doing it in the way your boss wants to do it.”
“I know.”
Silence settled over them like a blanket and the cabin suddenly felt extremely still and quiet. The end of the day was coming and it felt symbolic, somehow. Tomorrow was the last day of the competition and then they were due to head back to Manhattan.
Back to being single.
Back to pretending they weren’t hot for one another.
Back to their lives with big gaping holes in them.
“What are we doing?” she asked.
She waited for Keaton to give some quippy, meaningless diversion of a response.
We’re talking.
We’re having casual sex.
We’re taking part in a dog talent competition.
But instead, he simply said, “I don’t know.”
Against every sensible thought in her head, she went to him. The need to comfort him—and herself—overwhelmed her knowledge that doing so would be danger. They were pouring gasoline on a fire and hoping they wouldn’t get burned. It was a losing game. A mistake waiting to happen.
