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His stress is much deeper than parenthood or concern about retribution. Pocus is afraid of something, but he isn’t ready to share his fear. He’ll act calm and pretend everything is fine, but deep down, a war will wage inside of him that he’ll tell us nothing about.
I nod, assuring Pocus that I’ll do as he asks.
* * *
Iwalk into the kitchen, looking for something that might soothe me back to sleep, but of course, Tory is always a step ahead. She stands at the stove, brewing an earthy-smelling tea that I’m sure is for all of us. She may not be the psychic in her relationship, but she always seems to know what we need.
“You look tired, Hex,” she says bluntly. Though, to be fair, Tory is always blunt. She can’t help it.
“I’m exhausted. I hope whatever potion you’re brewing is for me.”
She sticks her tongue out at me and pours the pale-brown liquid into a teacup for me. She adds a squirt of honey and a generous spoonful of sugar and mixes the liquid delicately before handing the mug to me.
“It’s hot,” she warns. “Don’t forget to blow on it.”
I roll my eyes, resenting the way she chides me like a child, but then I take a sip without cooling it and I regret it. She smirks at me and gives me a knowing look. I pretend my mouth isn’t on fire as I casually blow into the teacup.
“What’s wrong?”
“Why would you think something is wrong?” I say, testing her. Tory has become one of my best friends in the world, but I often dislike how well she can read people. She knows me better than I know myself sometimes.
“Well, besides the obvious fact you’ve just come from church in the middle of the night, your stress is rolling off of you in waves.”
“You know I can’t talk about church,” I warn.
She shoots me a secret smile and assures me Seer will fill her in on everything, so not to worry. “You might as well spill the beans. What’s causing the premature frown lines?”
I sit down at the table, and she joins me, holding her teacup. Before the women arrived at the clubhouse, this would have been a ridiculous scenario, but Tory and I often ate breakfast together, talking over mugs of coffee. It became our routine over the last year.
“Pocus wants me to investigate the ghosts,” I admitted.
She frowns and nods, understanding the gravity of his command. She knows as well as I do how Pocus feels about the ghosts.
“But that’s not what’s really bothering you,” she pushes. “You’re stressed about something else.”
Sometimes I hate that Tory is so intuitive. She sees things I’m not ready to share and pushes me to confront my demons. Sometimes I just want to ignore my demons. I sigh and take a long sip from my cup.
“I had a weird dream,” I say after a long pause.
She quirks her eyebrow at me, prompting me further.
“There was a woman, and—”
She claps her hands excitedly, not letting me finish my thought. Typical Tory.
“It’s about time,” she whispers conspiratorially. “You’re due for love. It’s your turn! Tell me more about her.”
I shrug off her excitement. After all, there isn’t anything to tell. Not yet, anyway.
CHAPTERTWO
What did mankind do before coffee? Probably killed each other for sport to feel alive. It’s not a bad idea, come to think about it. Fuck Anderson for dying in the middle of the night. Fuck my life.
I open all the cabinets, searching for the fresh coffee grounds Buffy keeps around here somewhere. When I finally find what I’m looking for, I scoop out more grounds than I need, knowing the stronger the better. As the Prez, I can’t look weak in front of my men. They can be tired all they want, but I have to appear strong.
When the brew is finished, I pour myself a large mug of coffee and take a long gulp before it has a moment to cool. The hot liquid surges through me and gives me an ounce of a will to live this morning. Life would be so much better if I could crawl back into bed with Abigail and sleep off the bullshit waiting for me.
Of course, if that happened little Daisy would probably wake up and start screaming, and disturb our peace again. I love my daughter with all my heart. I’d literally take a bullet for her, which is not a sentiment I ever thought I’d feel about another person. Unfortunately, with the way she’s been interrupting my sleep schedule, sometimes I think I’d prefer the bullet.
