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I quickly unlock the door and barge through to the small room, instantly getting hit with a damp mold stench and groan, but hell, I’ll deal with a foul smell over being slaughtered by the men of Empire. Locking and bolting the door behind me, I switch on the lights and turn to take in the small room.
It’s exactly what I expect—a piece of shit, but it’ll have to do. Hell, I’ve definitely stayed in worse places.
Getting straight to work, I dart across the room and grab the set of drawers before inching the heavy piece of furniture across the room, certain the sound of it dragging across the floor would be waking up my new neighbors.
Once the heavy chest of drawers is blocking the door, I check that the windows are locked and pull the blinds closed, not feeling great about them. All it would take is a quick fist through the flimsy glass and I’d be dead, but what other options do I have?
Certain I’m as safe as I could possibly be, I grab the small first aid kit and make my way into the dirty bathroom, my face scrunching with disgust. I fight my gag reflexes, wanting to empty my stomach just to get the taste of dirt and mildew from my mouth.
The small bathroom is dingy and grimy with bright white ceramic tiles on the floor and dull brown walls covered in nicks and smudges. It’s disgusting and reminds me of something you find at a truck stop that’s generally been destroyed by oversized men who probably shouldn’t have had that last bite of Mexican food before hitting the road.
Trying to ignore it all, I strip out of my torn gown and toss it out of the bathroom, not risking dropping it on the filthy tiles. I pad across the small space and reach into the shower before turning on the tap and waiting as the water warms, then the second the bathroom starts filling with steam, I step into the water and let it cascade over my body.
I close my eyes, tipping my head back, and for the first time since the explosion, I feel at ease. Grabbing the motel soap, I scrub the dirt and ash from my body, and as I get down to my feet and really take in the extent of my injuries, I crumble, falling into a ball on the shower floor.
Sobs tear from the back of my throat, and I sit in the shower until the water runs cold, tears streaming down my face.
The boys are gone and my father . . . fuck.
In one single night, everything I knew was wiped away, and now I’m more alone than ever. Don’t get me wrong, I would have killed to be able to get away from the guys like this, to be able to secure my freedom, but I would have never wished them dead, no matter how much I might have said otherwise.
Dalton. Sawyer. Easton. Zade.
They were bigger than life, and just like that . . . they’re gone.
I know I barely knew them for long, but the short, intense time we had together was enough for them to each leave a mark on my heart. God, I hated them most of the time, but even on my darkest days, they gave me something to live for, something to crave and dream of. Hell, that even includes Zade.
I despised that man. He was ruthless, callous, and cruel, yet there was a vulnerability about him as though he was screaming for someone to save him, begging for a freedom of his own, a freedom that being the head of such an insane society would never allow.
Zade challenged me in a way I wasn’t prepared for, and he dared me to fight him at every chance I got. He wanted me to be strong, wanted me to fight for my life and prove to him that the blood in my veins made me worthy of being the true heir, even if I didn’t grow up in his world. And in turn, it was that fight that forced me to become a stronger version of myself, not some weak girl who would fall apart at the drop of a hat—Hell, fall apart like I’m doing right now.
If Zade could see me now, he’d be so disappointed watching me crumble to pieces on the floor of a dirty motel shower, but then he’d be the very first to drag me into his bed and hold me until I was strong enough to fight another day.
There’s no denying it, Zade DeVil was one hell of a complicated man, and I think I’m only just realizing how addicted I’d become to his wicked ways.
With the shower running cold, I pull myself to my feet and hastily shut off the water. No amount of scrubbing will make me feel clean tonight. Finding a towel, I wrap it around my freezing body before drying my hair and trudging back out to the bedroom, having no choice but to put my destroyed gown back on.
