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The Uber driver tries to chat, but after quickly realizing there’s no use, he gives up. As we fly back into Faders Bay, passing through the early-morning city filled with runners and cyclists, I start to feel sick.
We pass straight by the DeVil hotel, and I can’t help but gaze up at the penthouse, so many fucked-up memories there, but also, some really good ones too. This isn’t right. The boys shouldn’t have died like that, and just thinking about it now is making it hard to breathe.
I needed to get away from them, but not like this. I’d give anything to know they were still breathing, still searching every corner of this fucked-up world for me, knowing their hearts still beat for me.
I can’t accept that they’re not here. It hurts too much.
The driver takes us right across town, past Danny’s bar and what used to be my home, until finally pulling up at the train station, and without a second of hesitation, I bust out of the car and straight into the station, keeping my head down in case there are any cameras in here.
Hurrying up to the attendant, I get my ticket and spend the next twenty minutes pacing the terminal, hoping like fuck the train comes on time. My gaze remains locked on the doors as the fear of being caught almost cripples me.
When the train finally arrives, I hastily rush onto the car and find the furthest seat. Pulling the hoodie right over my head, I settle in for the long haul with my gaze locked out the window, hoping like fuck nobody comes for me.
My knee bounces, and the few minutes before the train leaves the station are some of the worst moments of my life, but the second the doors close and the train takes off, I can finally breathe.
It’s a long, six-hour train ride back to Missouri, and I spend every minute of it wishing I could be anywhere but here, but honestly, I don’t know where the hell I could possibly go. Missouri is my home. It’s where I grew up after my father was captured by Empire. It’s where I went to school and learned what kind of person I am. Though, who could have known that I still had so much more to learn about myself.
The woman I thought to be my aunt was an imposter placed in my life by Empire, but at least she gave me a loving home. She kept me safe and warm and ensured I had the best life I could possibly have, and with any luck, she’ll be able to give me some sort of guidance on how to survive this.
The long six-hour train ride seems to last a lifetime, and when we finally arrive at my stop, I almost expect Empire’s henchmen to be waiting at the door for me. Hell, maybe even my father’s. I wouldn’t put it past the old bastard to jump me the second I feel as though I’ve found freedom. After all, he gave his men the order—any force necessary.
Fuck, it’s been hours since hearing those words fall from his mouth, and I still can’t seem to process the magnitude of his betrayal. All these years I have imagined the man my father could have been, imagined the life we could have had together, all the things he would have taught me, and now that little girl who lives within my heart is shattered.
I think it was Zade who told me I couldn’t trust anybody in this world, and I never understood quite how literal he was being until last night. I knew Zade would betray me, and I knew that even after falling for them, the boys would too, but my father? I’ve never been so blindsided in my life.
As the doors open and people start stepping off the train, I take my time trying to blend in with the crowd. I feel as though I should be running or seeking shelter. I’m too exposed out here, but then, nobody knows I’m here. How could they?
Making my way off the platform, I search for a way to get back to my aunt’s place. I don’t exactly have that pervert’s phone to order an Uber again, and a taxi . . . Wait, do taxis even exist anymore?
I suppose I’m taking the bus.
Crossing to the bus shelters, I look through the schedules posted and try to figure out which bus I need to be on. Twenty minutes later, I’m sitting at the very back of the bus, my whole body shaking with unease.
It’s a good forty-five-minute bus ride back to my non-aunt’s town, and after getting off at my stop, I’m left to walk through the streets until finally making it back to the only place I’ve ever truly called home.
