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Chapter 11
OAKLEY
Soft jostling wakes me, and I open my eyes to find myself snuggled in Zade’s bed, his warm arms wrapped around me. The early morning sun is streaming in through the window, and as I turn in his arms and take in his face, it’s clear he’s in a deep sleep. Hell, of all the nights I’ve slept here in his arms, I don’t think I’ve ever seen him in a deep sleep. He’s the sleep-with-one-eye-open kinda guy.
He must have driven right through the night, looking over the rest of us as we slept in the car. I have no recollection of waking up and making my way up into the penthouse, so I can only assume that Zade carried me up here and put me to bed.
My heart breaks for him. He’s always the one to carry the burden on his shoulders—no matter how big that burden is. Any of the guys could have driven across the country through the night and they would have done it without question, and yet Zade didn’t even ask.
Bringing my hand up, I gently lay it across his face, hating how deeply I’m falling for him. It’s wrong. I shouldn’t feel this way for him, yet every dark corner of my heart craves him, needs him, desires him. If anything, I should take this chance to reach across to his bedside table, take his dagger, and end this once and for all, but the reality of the matter is that I would rather give my life than see anything happen to him.
How fucked up is that?
Leaning in, I press a gentle kiss to his cheek before lifting his arm from around my waist and slipping out of bed. My feet hit the ground, and I pad across to the bathroom, desperate to finally shower and feel somewhat human after spending hours sitting in a dirty alley.
The water is like heaven on my face, and despite wanting to stand in here for the rest of my life, I make it quick, scrubbing the dirt from the bottom of my feet and washing the blood matted in my hair.
Stepping out of the shower, I quickly towel dry before finding my silk robe hanging on the back of the door. After pulling it on, I pad out into Zade’s room to find my slippers. “Where are you going?” His deep tone sails across the room.
Glancing back at him from the door, I go to walk out before thinking better of it and making my way over to him, knowing if I were to walk out of here without a word, the big bastard would follow me right out and probably put a leash on me. Pressing my knee into the mattress, I lean over and drop a kiss to his forehead. “Coffee,” I tell him, grabbing the blanket and pulling it up over his bare chest. “Go back to sleep.”
Zade nods, and as I go to leave, he catches my hand, stopping me. I glance back, meeting his stare, and while not a single word is spoken, a million messages pass between us. I hold his stare a moment longer before pulling my hand free, determined not to get swept away by his wicked heart.
Stopping by the door on my way out, I grab my Sharpie and stare up at the tally marks on Zade’s bedroom wall. Then letting out a heavy sigh, I get to work, filling in the days I’ve missed before adding one more for today.
Six days to go.
Six days before Zade DeVil tears my heart right out of my body.
I wonder how he’s going to do it. Will it be quick and savage, trying to get it done as fast as possible, or will he take his time, trying to savor the moment? The Zade I met on day one wouldn’t have cared. He would have thrown me down, lunged at me with a dagger, and enjoyed my terror-filled screams, but the Zade I’ve come to know . . . I’m not really sure anymore. He’ll probably be gentle, try to make it hurt as little as possible. Maybe he will knock me out so I don’t feel the pain.
He’s worked for this his whole life, trained to be the best leader Empire could ever need, and there’s no question about it, Zade will be an incredible leader. I’ve watched him slaughter men without a single care, but I don’t know what kind of man will be left behind after he takes my life.
Risking looking back, I find Zade’s stare locked on the wall as if counting every single one of the tally strokes I’ve drawn, each one of them like a knife right to his chest. Having no words to offer him, I walk out the door, not wanting to hear what he could possibly have to say about it.
