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My heart kicked.
She sucked in a breath.
Our moment was shattered by a little finger poking me in the side, over and over, finding each and every scar from the electrodes. “What’s that and that and that?”
I waited for the urge to cover up or to shut down but all I felt, all I incredibly felt was joy. Untarnished, unblemished joy.
“A few things hurt me, but I’m okay now.” I held out my arms. “Do you...would you like to join us?” I flicked a look at Neri, who sat up in a lacy nightdress. “Is it okay if I pick her up?” We’d finally fallen asleep sometime around dawn, and judging by the light, it wasn’t that much after, but I wasn’t tired.
I was buzzing.
Tingling with life and newness.
“Of course, it is,” Neri said. Glancing past me at Ayla, she added, “Do you want to come snuggle with Mummy?”
Ayla crossed her arms and scowled at me. “Depends.”
“Oh?” I raised an eyebrow. “On what?”
“On who you are, silly. Why’re you in my Mummy’s bed?”
“Ah, well. I’m...I’m—”
“I’ve got this,” Neri murmured before sliding out of the blankets and padding toward Ayla. Dropping to her haunches, she took Ayla’s tiny hands in hers and said softly, “You know all those stories I told you about the lion being your father? The painting on your wall and—”
“The kitty on your arm?” Ayla poked Neri’s tattoo.
“Yes.” Neri nodded. “Remember how I told you he had to go away but he was never truly gone?”
“Uh-huh.” Ayla nodded and flicked me a look of intense concentration.
“Well...that lion came back. He’s right there.” She laughed under her breath. “I should probably read a parenting book on how we’re supposed to do this, but...Ayla...” She stood, grabbed her daughter, then deposited her on the bed right beside my prosthetic. The metal foot with its mechanical toes and carbon pylon poked out of the sheets. Unable to tell the temperature difference, I hadn’t been aware I’d stuck it out. Then again, it’d been the first time I’d slept with it on, and surprisingly, it didn’t ache.
I wouldn’t make a habit of it, and I supposed a part of me was still a little nervous about showing Neri my leg without the metal attachment, but...even that worry didn’t affect me.
I’d never been so fucking free. So in the moment. So grateful.
“Ayla, this...this is your dad. Aslan.”
“You are?” Ayla’s little eyebrows crawled up her face. “You don’t look like a lion.”
“Well, you don’t look like a cub.” I grinned. “Or moonlight, considering that’s what your name means.”
“Huh.” She frowned. “Suppose that makes sense.” She shifted to her knees, using my false leg as an anchor. Her serious stare shot straight to where she held me. The one place I couldn’t feel. Her mouth fell open. “Oh no, did you lose a leg like Scuttle?”
“Scuttle? Who’s Scuttle?”
Neri snorted and did her best not to laugh. “She means the seagull we’ve been feeding when we go out on The Fluke. It has semi-adopted us and has a missing leg.”
“I named it because it’s a mermaid,” Ayla announced proudly.
I chuckled, utterly bewildered but completely bewitched. “Neri? Care to translate again?”
She laughed, running her fingers through Ayla’s pretty hair. “She means we stole the name from the neurotic seagull in The Little Mermaid. She’s addicted to Disney.”
I smirked. “So, let me guess. She wants to live beneath the waves, just like her mother?”
Neri reared back with mock shock, planting a hand over her heart. “What on earth are you implying?” She fluttered her eyelashes with innocence. “Are you saying I have an ulterior motive to ensure my daughter is part fish, so she willingly moves to the Coral Sea—if and when we make it a possibility?”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. Couldn’t have her being like her father, could you? Stubborn as hell about never stepping foot in the ocean.”
“Well, I got him in the water eventually.” Her cheeks pinked. “In fact, I happen to remember the first night he swam with me was one of the best nights of my life.”
I stilled. The light-hearted conversation faded as I remembered why I’d gotten into the sea with her and why I’d pledged my soul to hers as I sank inside her that first time.
Ethan.
My first kill but not my last.
That was my only regret in this new world of light. I’d killed. How many I didn’t want to think about and none by choice. But I was still responsible for taking lives, and eventually, I would have to accept and move on. I would do my best to make up for my sins by ensuring I helped instead of hurt.
For now, though, I was just grateful I’d woken up, untethered from everything that’d haunted me.
I felt...reborn.
“You know I can fix you,” Ayla chirped, interrupting the tangled stare between Neri and me. “I’m gonna be a doctor.” She knocked on my metal shin, then fiddled with the single adjustable strap around the base of the coupling where it attached to my body. “I’m gonna be the best doctor in the whole wide world.”
