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I heard a knock on my door early in the morning, I had just concluded my early morning workout, and coming out of the shower, I quickly put on my sweatpants and a black undershirt and headed for the door. Something in me already knew who was behind it. I wanted to be wrong.
As I pulled the doorknob, I guessed it was Mark, he was in jeans and a black T-shirt. His hair was messy, it appeared as if he had been swimming all night as his eyes were slightly red.
"Come in," I muttered, as I gave way for him to enter as locked the door. Things were already awkward as this wasn't our normal early-morning approach toward each other. It was more vibrant and livelier with so much teasing. I would have teased him about his red eyes and maybe joked about him always being at an all-time high.
We walked towards the living room, he didn't sit on the couch which was his favorite house furniture, he just stood and glared at me. I knew he was trying to figure out how to start off the conversation as Mark has never been the confrontational type.
"What's up, Man?" I asked, kickstarting what I knew was going to be one hell of a hard conversation.
Mark ran his hands through his hair, " I was thinking all through the night," That would explain the red eyes, it was due to a lack of sleep.
"About what," I asked, trying to ease myself into this conversation.
"You and Kayla," he muttered, his voice slightly above a whisper.
"Okay?" I said swallowing the gul I had in the back of my throat since I heard his knock.
"I find it awfully strange that when you guys were confronted by Caleb gangs, you both were in the toilet together, what were you guys doing there? Why was she with you?"
This was what ushered the long silence, I couldn't lie to him, and I knew that he wasn't asking, he was more like praying; praying that whatever he was thinking was just a figment of his imagination and wasn't true.
I wish it were to be so, I wish I didn't give in to my desires that day at the mall, we wouldn't be here having such an uneasy conversation.
"I asked you a fucking question, Logan," Mark yelled out as he paced around the spot that he stood.
"You already know the answer," I muttered remorsefully, I was true.
"That's my fucking sister, Logan! My fucking sister, how dare you?!" I knew that in situations like this the less you say the better the outcome and I was hoping for the best outcome.
"I am sorry," I simply said.
"Sorry," he scoffed, " Fuck you, Logan, fuck you,” He was visibly angry, yet I could still see him struggling to keep his cool.
"Man calm down, I know you are angry but let us discuss this," Normally, between Mark and I, I was the hot-headed one, and Mark was the level-headed one always trying to see reasons for things. I was impulsive and irrational while Mark was calm, calculative, and collected. It is strange how the role had changed today, and I was on the other side of the table.
"I shouldn't be angry, Logan. I should just take it calmly that you have been fucking my sister behind my back. You want me to give you a trophy for that," He spat at me.
"It wasn't intentional, it just happened,"
"It just happened, you are unbelievable," he paced towards the diner. I knew he was trying to find his bearings. "How does fucking my little sister just happened,"
I couldn't begin to explain to him how we came to be, how the spark between us was instantaneous, and how I tried to kick against those unwanted feelings but fell right deep into them.
" How long has it been going on?" He finally asked a question I could answer.
"Not so long, just a few days after I was released from prison,"
" So you were that sex-hungry that you decided to prey on my little sister," This was the question I had tried to ask myself, was I sex-starved, or was it just lust?
I wasn't just happy about the whole concept of her being my best friend's sister. I had a lot of flings with female prison guards when I was incarcerated, in fact, they were all up in my business. So, I wasn't sex starved.
"It wasn't because of sex, I really like Kayla,"
"Bullshit,"
"I am being serious Mark, I really like Kayla and I know how awkward this is knowing she is your little sister but I can't help the way I feel about her," I tried to explain to Mark, I knew I was being incoherent and nothing about what I said made sense but that was how I felt and there was no other way I could explain it.
It was also new to me.
