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Silence hangs between me and my father. The only sound filtering through the speaker is his heavy breathing.
“Unless you want more bodies piled at your feet, this ends tonight.”
“You can’t win, Luca. You are a fool to think otherwise. Come home and spare the lives of those you love.” My father pauses. “Or watch them all die. One way or another, I will break you, son. You will bend a knee.” The call ends.
I look at my brothers. “I will sacrifice myself.” I lock eyes with Salem. “If it means protecting this club and our families, I will do it.”
“The hell you will.” Salem slams his fist against the table’s surface. “We are family. We stand together or fall together.”
His words strike a chord deep within me, reminding me of our bond. The others pound their fists against the table, agreeing with his statement.
Salem stands. “It’s late. Make rounds. Make sure the place is locked tight. Sleep with your weapon ready and try to get some rest. We’ll figure out our next moves tomorrow.”
With church over and still no resolution to the battle with my father, I venture outside with Baja and walk around the property.
“I know what you’re thinkin’ of doin’ brother.” Baja eyes me.
“You don’t know shit.”
“The fuck I don’t. I’m not sayin’ I wouldn’t be thinkin’ of doin’ the same thing, brother, but this isn’t just your fight. That motherfucker walked into our town. This is our war. Like Prez said. We fight together and fall together.” We finish walking the property in silence while the battle inside my head continues.
I stroll inside, down the hall to my room, and find my woman awake.
“Hey.” She closes her laptop and sets it on the nightstand.
Her eyes follow me as I move about the room. I place my weapon on the nightstand, then kick off my boots and strip the clothes from my body. I turn off the light and move toward the bed. Sukie lifts the covers, and I slide in beside her. Needing nothing more than to hold her and feel her warmth, I pull Sukie’s body closer to mine, wrapping her in my arms. No words are spoken. Just being with my woman helps to silence the chaos inside my head. She is my sanctuary.
19
SUKIE
After spending forty-eight hours on lockdown at the clubhouse, I am officially stir-crazy. Mom, on the other hand, is content. Her nervousness about meeting everyone is now nonexistent. She’s been taken under Ophelia’s wing. Those two have been chatting up a storm like they’ve known each other for years. Mom is also obsessed with Mystic’s daughter and Sage’s baby girl. Whenever she has Ashlyn in her arms, she’s got this twinkle in her eye. My mom has baby fever. I see it written all over her face when she looks at me and Luca together. I make a mental note to talk with her about that later and shut down whatever ideas she has swarming inside that head of hers.
That’s the least of my worries. What has me freaked out is how normal everyone is acting toward me. Luca’s ex showed up at the clubhouse, effectively turning my entire world upside down, spilling a secret my mom and I held close for many years. I had every intention of taking it to the grave. Up until recently, anyway.
I don’t for one second regret my stepfather’s death. My guilt doesn’t reside in the fact I killed someone. My guilt stems from the other truth. That I allowed my mother to take the fall for a crime she didn’t commit. Because of me, she endured years of hell, locked up with actual criminals.
A part of me understands why. If I had been in the same position, I would have gone to prison for my child too, because that’s what parents do. They protect their children. But the other part of me can’t let go of the guilt. I constantly replay that night over and over in my head. I should have tried harder to get away from my stepfather. I should have gone to my grandmother’s house after school and waited for my mom to get home from work before I went home.
I wish I could stop torturing myself.
Choices were made, and we have to live with the consequences of those choices. Recently, I’ve been coming to terms with the past. If Luca and I were to share a life, I didn’t want a life with secrets. I never felt like Luca would pass judgment or look at me differently after knowing what I’d done. Not only did Luca have my back when Bianca exposed me and my mom, but so did the rest of the club. Not one person asked for an explanation or looked at me as if they were disgusted or disappointed.
The night only went downhill from that point. Bianca’s attempt at ratting me out didn’t go as planned. You play stupid games; you win stupid prizes. That may sound insensitive of me, but the woman was awful. She tried to help Luca’s father by blackmailing him after confronting me at Belladonna’s. That was foolish on her part. It’s hard to give a shit about someone like that. I watched Luca closely that night, looking for any sign he was feeling unsettled about the demise of his ex-wife, but he showed no reaction. None. I mean, this was a woman he once loved. But Luca was unfazed.
Now it’s been two days, and it feels like we are all in limbo. I’m on pins and needles, waiting for the other shoe to drop. Bianca was a threat all on her own, but she was never the club’s primary cause of concern. Luca’s father has made it clear he’s unwilling to relent in his quest to gain control over Luca.
Over the past couple of days, I’ve silently questioned why Luca and the club have stagnated in their actions. Something tells me we are stuck inside a vortex. It’s the quiet before the storm. Fallen Ravens are not to be underestimated. They are quiet for a reason.
“You good, darlin’?” A hand on my shoulder snaps me out of my wandering thoughts.
I shake my head and smile at Baja. “What?”
He chuckles. “I called your name twice, but you were in a different zone.”
“Yeah, sorry. I spaced out there for a minute.” I smile. “What were you saying?”
“I asked if you needed some help. If you’re going to be stuck with me, I may as well make myself useful.” Baja chuckles.
