AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Or the bedroom,” she suggests in a husky whisper right in my ear. “So I can ride you six ways to Sunday. Backward, forwards, upside down, inside out…all the ways.”
“Inside out! I’m not sure I want to find out about that one,” I say with a groan.
She laughs. “Yeah, I know. Okay, well, we can do the others.”
“Upside down?”
She grins deviously at me. Devilish looks good on her. Really good. “Why not?”
My half-on, half-off pants might make things difficult, but the house isn’t huge, so I quickly steer us to the bedroom. Kissing Nina the whole way makes me forget about how silly I must look, and she kisses me back with the kind of fervor that says she doesn’t care one bit.
I pass the door and realize it’s only a few more seconds until I can strip my clothes all the way off and find out what upside down actually means.
Thump, thump, rattle, rattle, knock.
“What was that?” Nina nearly flings herself out of my arms, but I manage to put her down on the floor. As soon as her feet touch solid ground, she dives for the covers and gets the quilt wrapped around herself.
I hastily hike up my boxers and pants. This is not what I’m supposed to be doing. I’m supposed to be taking these thingsoff.
“That would be intruders,” I state dryly. My dick is telling me to blow up the whole world. He is not happy. Unhappy dick, unhappy wife, unhappy life. Except Nina isn’t my wife, and she isn’t going to be. Ugh, I don’t know why the worst thoughts have a tendency to pop into my head.
“Do you think it’s the donkey?” Nina scrambles off the bed, a blanket mummy going for the shopping bag she folded her new clothes back into.
“I think it’s my family coming to bother us again.”
“Oh my god! We were right by the window. Do you think they saw anything?”
“I’ll judge the level of smugness when I answer the door. They have no shame, so it won’t be an embarrassment. Instead, it will be an absolutely thrilled pleasure that what they wanted to happen was happening and playing out in front of their eyes.”
“Oh god. Oh gross! Do you think they were spying on us? More cameras? Binoculars?”
The thought of either of those things makes me furious. “If that’s the case, then we’re going with the spike belt ASAfuckingP.”
I’m fairly well put back together, minus the look that is going to terrorize anyone who happens to be on my doorstep, but I can’t do anything about that. My dick has totally deflated thinking about it being my mom and grandma on the other side of the door.
As soon as I pull open the door, I know it. They either heard or saw something because their faces are all smug galore.
“Do you both not have limits?” I growl, stepping out onto the porch. “There’s such a thing as privacy!”
“We don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mom says, feigning innocence. She’s a terrible actor.
Granny, on the other hand, doesn’t even try to lie. “We saw boobs. But it’s no big deal. Nothing we don’t all have.”
I make more caveman noises. “How did you see boobs?”
“Well, we were coming down the driveway just to check up on you both and make sure you were still doing alright because I promised Nina’s family that I’d give them an update since she won’t return their calls or texts, and we saw…things through the window. It’s not our fault! It was just there. We didn’t look for more than a second, I swear.” My granny was clearly trying to hide her smirk, but it wasn’t very successful.
“I covered her eyes, and then I covered my own.”
“While I was driving!” my granny exclaims.
“We nearly crashed the car,” Mom says with a chuckle.
“What were you doing naked in the kitchen anyway?” Granny asks.
“With the curtains wide open and the lights on,” Mom adds.
“Good god. No!” I put up both hands. “No. We arenothaving this conversation. I hope Nina didn’t hear any of what you just said because she’ll be mortified. She’s fine, and we still aren’t getting married. Please go away. She’s here for four more days, and then I’m sure she’ll turn on her phone and call her family. She’s trying to figure out what to say to them because we had a lawyer walk us through the entirety of the clauses in the paperwork, including the whole disowning thing, and she’s taking it hard. She doesn’t want to bear that kind of responsibility.”
