AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“What happened?” My palm itched with the desire to touch him, to offer him some comfort and support. I held back, unsure if he’d be receptive to it right now.
“The school kicked me off the swim team and revoked my scholarship.”
“For being at a party?”
“For being the scapegoat.” He chuckled mirthlessly. “That kid I was arrested with, he and his sister disappeared right after he was released and the whole family just picked up and moved away. His dad owns our town, literally owns most of the land, and he was running around threatening to shut down businesses and put people out of work. Everyone decided it was all my fault, and they punished me by taking away the thing I loved most, not to mention my chance at a future.”
“You didn’t swim for your new school?”
“The public school doesn’t have a team. No access to a facility. An athletic scholarship was my only chance at going to college.”
My mind whirred as the pieces fell into place.
“So yeah. That’s the story of why I’m a giant loser with zero direction.” He grabbed his spoon and rubbed his thumb over the concave surface. “And the best part is, that guy I was arrested with, the one who was actually holding? He was my swim team rival and bully. The guy who made my life hell for years while also confusing the fuck out of my dick.”
“You had a crush on him.”
“Classic Gray, falling for an asshole.” He stuck his spoon in his empty jar. “He was one of the first guys I had a crush on, back when I was figuring out I like guys. I didn’t understand why I was into him when he was such a dick, but I apparently have a type.”
“And you came to the house after all this happened?”
He nodded. “About a month later. Mom had just given birth to my little brother and I felt like she’d replaced me. Like she was finally having the family she deserved and I didn’t have a place with them anymore. Eli was being bullied at school and I wasn’t there to protect him. I was failing everyone, I was at rock bottom. I thought maybe he’d care if he knew how close to the edge I was.”
“But he ignored you.”
“And blamed you.” Graham clenched his fists so tight his knuckles went white. “He said he would have been there for me if he’d known. Said a lot of shit that was too good to be true. And like an idiot, I believed him.”
“You’re not an idiot.”
“Aren’t I? How many times can someone fall for the same BS before it goes from pathetic to stupid?” He let out a low growl. “I hate him. The one time I needed him, he ignored me, then lied and blamed you. I’ve hated you for years because I thought you were just one more asshole who’d kicked me when I was down. But it wasn’t you. It was never you.”
Something he said earlier suddenly popped into place. “Wait, you said your brother is dating your rival. The same one who…”
“Yup. My little brother is madly in love with my high school rival and bully. The same guy who ruined my life.”
“That’s awkward as fuck.”
“Especially since I’m the only one who still cares.” Distractedly, he piled our dishes in front of him. “I’m trying to let it go. He might have been a jerk to me in school, but he was always good to Eli. He was the only other kid who wasn’t mean to him. Who stuck up for him and was kind to him.
“And now that I have the whole story, I can see that all the shit that happened after we were arrested wasn’t his fault. He might have been the reason, but he wasn’t responsible for what the school or the cops did. But it’s hard. Eli loves him. Our parents and siblings adore him. He’s exactly who my brother needs, and I’m trying to be happy for him. I am. But it’s like being bitch-slapped with my failures every time I see them together. Everyone expects me to get over ten years of animosity in a matter of weeks. Like I can just wave a magic wand and instantly forgive and forget when I still live with the consequences of that night every single day.”
I caught his hand and gave it a little squeeze as he reached for my cup. “I’m sorry your dad lied to you. I had no idea any of that was going on.”
“Not your fault he’s a douchenozzle.” He studied me for a few beats. “Why do you hate me?”
I sighed and rubbed my palms against my thighs. “I don’t. And I’m not sure I ever did. I resented you. Hated how Russ used you to make my life hell. It didn’t help that you acted like a dickhead the few times I did see you. But I never really hated you.”
“How did my dad use me to make your life miserable?” he asked. “The man abandoned me when I was five years old and had almost no contact with me.”
“Back when you were on painkillers, you told me I had the family you should have had,” I said slowly. “Do you remember that?”
He shook his head.
“You also told me about what he was like before he left. The abuse, the affairs, the drinking.”
“Jesus, I did? What else did I say?”
“A lot, but most of it was just rambling and didn’t make sense.”
