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Michael smiled up at them. “No problem,” he said while Finley shook his head. Once they were alone, Michael laughed and added, “Not real subtle, are they?”
Finley laughed. “Nope. But I think they mean well.”
Michael’s brown eyes twinkled. “I’m definitely not sorry for an opportunity to get to know you better.” His smile was beautiful, but it didn’t give Finley butterflies in his stomach.
“Likewise.”I can always use another friend.
Could it develop into something special like Harry had said? He didn’t think so, and a part of him just couldn’t give up on Kieran yet. Honesty and a free lunch were the only things he could offer. Michael took it well and even delighted Finley with a wonderful sense of humor. It felt good to laugh, and Michael must’ve fed off his energy because he kept it rolling throughout lunch. Midway through their burger and fries, someone tapped on the window beside them. Finley turned his head and saw Rueben smiling and waving at him. Then he shifted his gaze to the right and locked eyes with Kieran. Finley found it hard to breathe as they stared at each other for several moments. Kieran shifted his gaze to Michael, then back to Finley before he turned and walked away, leaving Rueben to scramble after him.
“Do you need to leave?” Michael asked when Finley continued to stare at the empty sidewalk.
Finley’s knee-jerk reaction was to slap some bills on the table to cover lunch and chase after Kieran, but he squelched the notion. He’d done nothing wrong. Finley decided to finish lunch, make a new friend, and seek Kieran out after he cooled off.
“Nope,” Finley said. “In fact, I’m going to order dessert. I just can’t decide if it will be the apple crisp or chocolate cream pie. Would you like anything?”
“I don’t eat sweets, but thank you.”
Finley sighed inwardly. He wasn’t sure they could even be friends now.So long, Michael.
Kieran had no right to feel so rattled after seeing Finley at lunch with another guy. The gossip around the ranch was that Finley had left shortly after dinner each night and hadn’t returned for a few hours. Kieran thought he was scouring pawn shops and thrift stores to find his camera equipment, but maybe he’d been meeting that guy. Were they on a date at the diner?
In the same span of time that Finley had found a potential replacement, Kieran had lived two existences. The first half of the week, Kieran had locked himself down so tightly that he blocked out all emotions, leaving no space for sorrow, anger, regret, pining, or lust. It was like he’d been sent right back to jail. He had work, and he had Little Mama, who must’ve sensed his agitation or was getting closer to having her kittens. She’d been extra cuddly and had soothed him with her purring, providing comfort he wanted to refuse but couldn’t. Maybe it was her affection that had cracked his façade enough midweek to let the pining and regret drip into his psyche.
Kieran spent those evenings sketching scenes from his memory. His fingers were clumsy and out of practice at first, so he warmed up with landscape renderings. Who cared if some of them were a little more abstract than he’d intended. Certainly not Little Mama, who curled up in his lap and purred until Kieran found the courage to draw the subject that called to him most. He’d closed his eyes, recalled all the special moments he’d shared with Finley, and recreated them with a charcoal pencil. When he finished each sketch, Kieran slapped a bandage on his leaking defenses, and reminded himself that Finley was better off without him.
Thinking it was one thing, but actually seeing it was another. Finley laughing with the handsome stranger punched a hole in his dam, and everything he’d suppressed flooded into his mind. Kieran felt the heat they’d shared in the motel, the happiness and sense of rightness Finley evoked. The sharp longing was a knife to the heart, but he kept moving forward. Shame for letting Finley down moved in next, followed by humiliation for hurting Finley when he’d only wanted to punish himself. As strong as those emotions were, they paled in comparison to the jealousy coursing through his blood. Finley belonged with him, not that slicked-back, toothy fucker in the diner.
“Wait up,” Rueben called out.
Christ, he’d forgotten he wasn’t alone. Kieran slowed so Rue could catch up. “Sorry about that.”
“The scene back there isn’t what you think it is,” Rue said, sounding a little winded.
“Doesn’t matter.” Then he stopped and whirled to face Rueben. “But why do you think that?”
“Finley stares at you the way I stare at the last piece of German chocolate cake.”
Kieran waved the remark away, but it burrowed into his brain like a beetle. He had just witnessed Rueben lusting after the dessert the previous night, so he had a visual reference. Did Finley look at him like he wanted to devour him? He gagged his inner cynic so he could attempt objectivity when he replayed their encounters. God yes, Finley looked at him like he was cherry crisp. A lightness he definitely had no right to feel entered the fray, picked up a sword, and prepared to battle.Joy, you fickle bitch, what are you doing here?Then he realized the feeling wasn’t as foreign to him as it should’ve been. Kieran had grown too complacent and had allowed himself to get caught up in the spirit of community on the ranch. Attachments were formed, bonds were made, and he’d nearly let himself fall in lo—
“I gotta get out of here,” Kieran said desperately.
“I’m ready to go back to the ranch too.” Rue had misunderstood his sense of urgency and Kieran didn’t correct him. Instead, he started to plan. Normally, he’d wait until the poker game started, but he had a feeling Finley would want to talk to him when he got back.
Cash was in Denver until Sunday night again, Ivan wouldn’t return from Colorado Springs until after dinner, and Harry was excited about her mani-pedi and another girls’ night with her friends. She’d told everyone at breakfast they had to fend for themselves, so he presumed she would be gone. Tyler and Owen were delivering Big Stanley, a gorgeous chestnut stallion, to his forever home, and Kieran rarely ran into the other guys unless it was mealtime, so he only needed to worry about Rueben. If he was distracted, Kieran would be clear to search Cash’s office for answers.
As if fate had intervened, Rueben’s phone rang when they were a mile or two away from the ranch. Kieran had learned enough Spanish in jail to determine Rue was talking to his grandmother. Rueben’s rapid cadence made it hard for him to follow, but he definitely heard Rue’s promise to call her back in ten minutes.
“There goes the rest of my afternoon,” Rue said once he disconnected.
“Maybe wait a while to call her back. Kick back and watch some TV.”
Rue chuckled as he turned onto the ranch’s long driveway. “No way, man. You don’t keep my abuela waiting. She acts like she is going to die any minute and what she has to say is too important to take to the grave. I told her I’d call her back in ten minutes, so I’d better make it eight.”
Kieran planned to hang out in his cabin long enough for Rueben to become engrossed in his conversation. Then he’d return his borrowed book to Cash’s library and search his office next door. Little Mama didn’t greet him when he stepped inside, nor did he see her on the furniture.
“Little Mama,” he called out in alarm. A weak meow greeted him from the bathroom and he found her lying in the shower. She’d already given birth to one kitten and its placenta and had managed to break the sac open on its tiny body. Her stomach contracted, and she panted softly, making him think the next kitten’s arrival was imminent. Finley had a lot of experience with cats in Tennessee, and prior to the disaster at Dexter’s, he had given Kieran pointers on what to look for and how to help.
“You’re doing great, Little Mama,” he whispered as he rubbed behind her ears. Kieran grabbed a washcloth, wetted it in the sink, and then made sure the first kitten had a clean airway. He talked soothingly to the cat while she delivered kitty number two. She immediately started licking her baby to break the sac open, and Kieran stayed out of her way until her struggle became obvious. “Let me help,” he cooed, taking over caring for the newest addition.
