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“You’re pregnant?” he whispered, and suddenly I realized it could all be so much worse.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Alex
Ilookedatthemboth as I stood in the doorway. Two of the people who meant the most to me in the whole world. But as I stared at them, I didn’t see my brother. Or the woman who meant the world to me, and who I wanted to care for, to cherish. Instead, I saw two strangers. People who’d been discussing me behind my back.
I spent the morning recovering from my sleepless night in my hotel room. Thank-you notes and flowers arrived from the party, sitting on the grand table in my hotel suite. But I couldn’t feel happy, not while I knew Lena was out there, feeling guilty, feeling ashamed of herself.
So, I decided what to do. I’d go to her. I’d tell her that it didn’t matter that she hadn’t told me about Jared; that it didn’t bother me that she’d been with him before me. I told myself I wasn’t like other men, who might be jealous, or insecure about it.
Not that I was fine with it. And not that I was fine about the fact that Lena had withheld the truth. But I knew I had a part in my own deception; I knew I’d pushed her to be closer to me, and fate and circumstance had aligned to bring us closer. It was natural that she’d felt nervous about telling me in the first place, especially if she needed the job as my PA. And I understood how things had gotten so complicated and so intense that she might have feared my reaction by telling me.
But when I got to Lena’s hotel room that afternoon, and listened, I’d heard her talking. Heard her speak to my brother. Heard him blame me for what had happened.
And heard Lena confess that she was pregnant; that she was carrying my child.
And suddenly, a simmering feeling of betrayal permeated my sense, turning me from a man who was willing to forgive, into a man who was bitter. Bitter about being wronged. Bitter about being shut out.
“You told him,” I said, my jaw clenched.
“I didn’t want to, but he kept pressing me,” she said quietly. Her hair was distressed, and strands of it had fallen around her face and over her eyes. Somehow, she only looked more beautiful. But now her beauty looked terrible, it only made the nature of what we’d done to one another even worse.
“You told him,” I said again, “before you told me.”
“He’s your brother,” Lena said helplessly, stepping back from me. “I thought he’d understand.”
“Understand?” I snapped suddenly, and I saw Lena flinch. That was the worst thing of all. To know that my anger, my feelings, were beyond my control. I, the guy who was nothing if not in control of where he went, who he saw, and what was happening around him.
But this situation was beyond my control. And with it, my feelings had simmered in tension until now. I finally snapped. Like a rubber band pulled too tight, I felt the tension in my body loosen.
“You thought I’d understand?” I said, glowering down at her. “You thought that Jared—” I gestured at my brother, who stood cockily and confidently behind Lena “—what I was feeling?”
I looked up at him. A guy I’d known my whole life. A guy whom I loved, despite all his flaws. Despite the rivalries, despite our petty grievances.
“Maybe there’s something you need to know about Jared,” I said slowly. “Since you feel so comfortable telling him my secrets. Our secrets.”
“Alex,” began Jared, but I held up my hand. I held it out straight, my palm facing him.
“Shut up,” I said. “Lena.”
She looked up at me, and her eyes were wide, nervous, and she looked back at Jared, and looked back at me. There was time to turn back. Time to apologize, time to calm down, time to talk about it.
Only there wasn’t. I might have had time to do all those things. But I didn’t have the will, didn’t have the inclination.
“Maybe Jared hasn’t told you what he’s doing out here anyway,” I said. “Jared’s been talking to a guy called Allen Mankiewicz. You heard of him?”
She paused and shook her head.
“Allen Mank’s the C.E.O. of Globocorp,” I said. “He’s the head of one of the largest multinational conglomerates. And Mank’s just agreed to give you ten million dollars—hasn’t he, Jared?”
“It’s not like that,” said Jared.
“Not like what?” I sneered.
He looked away and said nothing.
“Mank’s agreeing to give Jared an investment to build a hotel in LA. Did you know that? Did you know that your ex—my brother—is about to go into business against me?”
