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Jack reached for both my hands and set my palms to his chest, recognizing I was spiraling. Did he know the feel of his heartbeat strangely calmed me down? What in the world was going on with me? With us?
“Are you talking about the man my team is after? The kidnapper? I told you he’s never taken anyone from the show.” The genuine reassurance in his tone was comforting, but still not enough to fully calm my racing heart and mind.
No, that’s not who I’m thinking about. I couldn’t voice my thoughts; he couldn’t know about my dark and messy past. Plus, the truth would place him in an awkward spot, so that was out of the question. “I, um.” I forced a nod. “Yeah, the serial kidnapper . . . he won’t come to the jungle and attack us?” I hated myself for the lie, but I didn’t have a choice.
“Not unless he changes his MO. And if he does that, he’ll never be able to use the show to choose women again. He’d shine a light on himself that way.”
Yeah, maybe that bastard wouldn’t come for us, but there was another asshole that wouldn’t care about taking Lucy and me from the show.
And oh, Lucy slept in a cameraless treehouse last night. My palms began to slip from Jack’s chest, but he snatched my wrists and held them in place.
Nothing happened to Lucy last night. He doesn’t know we’re here. He’s not behind this. He would’ve taken her last night if that was the case. And the horrible fact women from other seasons were missing suggested that, yeah . . . this wasn’t about us. We’re just blonde and match some psycho’s wants.
“You good?” Jack asked, his tone steady but still rippling with concern. And why wouldn’t he be worried? I was giving him far too many reasons to question me. “Talk to me. You’re nervous, but it’s not about my mission. Well, not entirely.” He closed his eyes and a few breaths of silence later confessed, “I have a feeling you and I were brought together for a reason. I wanted it to be fate we met, as in . . . well, you know . . . but I’m pretty sure it was because I’m supposed to help you.” There was a sadness to his tone that slipped beneath my defenses and momentarily made me lose my edge of paranoia.
You want me. Feel something for me. I gulped. But you’ll never be able to have me. And I had no idea how to admit that to him, especially when I felt the pull between us, too.
“Why do you think that?” I was still trying to decide what to do. Lucy and I were on a team with people connected to the government, caught up in a show being used to kidnap women, and even though the one man I was more terrified of than anyone didn’t seem to be behind it, there were still plenty of reasons for us to bail and leave the competition early.
Jack slowly opened his eyes. “This will sound weird, but my friend just kind of knows things. I don’t know how to explain it, but we were working with her on a gig in Cape Town, and she was the reason I was at the bar that night. She canceled, then I met you. Now you’re here. She’s even here. I think she knew you needed help.”
Yeah, he was right. That was weird. But maybe it somehow still made more sense than us both accidentally winding up in the same place. “What do you mean she’s here? Is that what Carter told you at the pool that made you upset?”
“You really are perceptive. Or maybe I’m just a bad actor.” He stroked his jawline for a second. “She was supposed to remain on the outside with my team, but she’s smart and fast thinking and is now undercover as a sponsor.”
“Wait, what? Isn’t that even riskier if she gets caught?”
“My thoughts exactly when he told me.”
“Ohhh. That’s why Carter lost focus fighting you. He saw her, didn’t he?” At least his story kept adding up. Way more than mine would. I couldn’t even pretend to lie and say I didn’t trust this man, though. I just . . . did.
“Yeah, he noticed her arriving in the distance, and after the fight, he checked the phone we smuggled in. My best friend, who happens to be one of my team leaders, texted from his position in the jungle to let us know the change in plans, that she’s on the inside as a sponsor,” he quickly explained.
“Gray?” I asked, remembering the stories he’d shared about his best friend back in Cape Town.
“Good memory, and yeah, he’s in the jungle right now. And listen, he’s not only someone I trust with my life, but he’s got the full weight of the United States government at his disposal if need be. So, I promise you, you and your sister are in good hands.”
“What do you mean? Who is he?” Because “full weight of the United States government” didn’t do wonders to ease my nerves.
“His father is Secretary of Defense. He works for the President.”
I whirled away from him, pulling my hands from his grasp, feeling a bit lightheaded. This just keeps getting better and better. I peered at the thatched roof, feeling a trickle of sweat slide between my breasts as I tried to find a way to calm down.
Jack circled me, not bothering to try and turn me around.
I had to think quickly, change the subject so he’d forget my reaction to his whole connection-to-the-President thing. “I left you that morning in Cape Town because I was trying to find a pen to leave you my number and stumbled upon a gun instead,” I rushed out. “Curiosity had me checking your ID, and I found your passport with the name Kevin. I got scared and took off.”
When I found the courage to look him in the eyes, there wasn’t anger there for snooping. Just unmistakable relief. “That’s why you left? Not because you didn’t, uh, want to see me again?”
I wet my lips. “I wanted you, Jack. I still . . .” I shook my head, hating myself for this, but I whispered, “But I can’t want you. It’d never work. We can never be together.” My stomach squeezed at how much I hated those words and the defeated look he gave me next. “We have to assume the reason we met was because of this game and for no other reason. As you said, your friend brought us together.”
“What are you saying?” he asked, his tone as tough as gravel.
I tore my hand through my hair, pushing my bangs away from my face as I stole a second to think. “As much as I want to take off now, the idea of a girl going missing because I left, and your team got booted so you couldn’t help, isn’t something I can stomach.” I’d do anything to save Lucy, but I couldn’t let someone else’s sister or daughter go missing either. “So, let’s get through this game, keep my sister from getting taken, find your bad guy, and then we go our separate ways. We can never see each other again after that. And please, please, destroy the photo you have of me. Never run my face, or my sister’s, through any recognition program.” He opened his mouth to talk, and I shook my head, a plea not to protest. “Also, promise me you’ll destroy the footage from this show.”
He quietly studied me before his shoulders fell, and he agreed, “You have my word. And the footage will be destroyed.” One pause later, he begged, “But damnit, Charley, please tell me what’s going on with you. Who are you scared of? Running from? Why won’t you trust me to help you?”
“I barely know you. And yet, I do trust you.” That one-second feeling Mom told me to listen to had to be why. Everything he said to me washed away any doubts. He was a good man. Safe and honest. “And I, um, do like you,” I confessed, “which is why I’m not going to tell you anything. I’m doing it for you. To protect you.”
