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“I can’t. You know this. Part of it is to protect you, not lead anyone back to you. The other part is keeping my focus on what it needs to be. The slightest diversion could cost me my life. You’re a beautiful distraction for me, Piper. One I can’t afford to take when I’m out in the streets.”
“And I understand that, though I don’t like it. Your life was set up the way it was long before me, and it would be unfair to ask you to change. The reality is I’m young. I’m only twenty-five, and I’m not ready for what your life brings. So please, Marco. Do us both a favor and walk out that door.”
“I’ll be back.”
“Don’t bother. Don’t return unless you’re a free man divorced from your wife.”
“We both know that can’t happen, Piper. You understand why.”
“No. The only thing that I understand is that I want and deserve more. It doesn’t have to be you, but it will be someone.”
“You’ll always belong to me.”
“My heart can’t take you, Marco. Can’t you see that you’re destroying me? You’re fucking breaking me piece by piece, and one day I’ll be this empty shell. I have nothing left to give you. If you loved me, you could see that!” she cries.
It’s breaking me to see her like this, and I know she’s right, but I can’t admit that to her. Admitting that out loud would be like giving up hope.
“Goodbye, Marco.”
I watch as she gets off the bed and walks into the bathroom closing the door behind her. I sit back on the bed for several long minutes, thinking about what she’s asking.
I’m a selfish bastard, and I don’t want to give her up but she’s right. She deserves better than me. I’ll never be free to love her the way that she deserves. Who the fuck told me to open my heart in the first place? I know I’m unlucky in love and have no business considering it.
I get up, grab my wallet, keys, and jacket, and walk out the door. I don’t bother looking back as I get into my car and head for the airport. Every article of clothing and shoes that I’ve left at her place, she can have it or she can burn it.
I will stay away. It may eventually cause my destruction or even my demise, but I promise with my last breath that I will remain out of Piper’s life. I love her too fucking much not to.
I feel the cells clanging into place over my heart like the bars of a jail cell. They are enclosing my heart inside and keeping everything out. I’m shutting down, and I feel the demon inside of me waiting to come out. He’s like a fire-breathing dragon waiting to lick up everything in his path and salvage nothing.
I no longer give two fucks about anything. Or anyone.
“That’s it, baby. Milk me dry,” I say when Serena cups my balls in her hands and deep throats me. I grab the sides of her face and pump deep inside her just how she likes it until her mascara smears, and she’s choking off my shit.
My grunts are hurried and loud as I pump harder and harder, trying to chase thoughts of Piper away. I finally give up and imagine her mouth working me over. That’s when I cum.
***
SERENA HAS THREE PLACES. She’s got the little cottage in the back of Alessandro’s house that she stays in when she’s working; she’s got the big mansion that she lives in with her feeble, dying husband; and she has a little apartment that she kept even after agreeing to the marriage arrangement with her husband.
He pays for the little apartment because although he doesn’t mind her having sex with other men since he can’t, he doesn’t want her doing it in his home. The entire shit is a joke to me.
I’m getting ready to leave, and it’s reminiscent of the time that I walked away from Piper. When I walked away from her, I gave a damn though I tried to pretend I didn’t. I had to shut off my feelings and haven’t turned them back on until I saw her again.
“What do you mean that you’re moving?”
“I’m relocating to the States.”
“What the fuck for?”
“Business.”
“You have a life here, Marco!”
“One that is coming to an end.”
“You fucking selfish bastard!” she shouts at me. “I have given you all of me for the last couple of years, and you find it this easy to walk away? Did I not mean anything to you?”
“What do you want from me?”
