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“It’s what he does when I’m not around. Who he becomes when he’s with the MC.”
“And who is that person?”
“I don’t know, honestly. From what I’ve seen, he seems more aggressive, dangerous, and meaner. Whereas I can deal with that, he said something that made me think maybe we can’t be together.”
As I state each of those descriptions, I find I’m just as turned on by dangerous Nitro as I am tender Caelan. They are one and the same, and I want them both.
“What?”
“He insisted that, eventually, I would have to come to the MC again. That’s a part of his world. All those loud, rambunctious, alpha male, and heady testosterone with ideals and values different than mine....” I shudder.
“Yet, he’s the same man that protected your life. Took you under his wing and made safety provisions for your family until it was safe for all of us to return to our lives,” Niecy says.
My family doesn’t know the truth. We simply told them Ryan was shot investigating gang activity, they’d come to the hospital to finish the job, and I’d gotten in the way. The safety precautions for Tiff and me to leave work were simply in case someone returned to attack me.
“Most people won’t understand why I’m with him.”
Niecy grabs my hands across the table. “Moni, if he makes you feel good from your head down to your toes, he makes you moan his name, and he treats you good...if he brings a smile to your face and cares about yours and your family’s well-being, to hell with the haters.”
17 – NITRO (3 Weeks Later)
Idon’t look forwardto returning home tonight. Tonight, just like every night for the last three weeks, it’ll just be Zeus and me. I’ve got details about Simone’s work shift and made it my business to have a man on her daily, ensuring her safety. I drop by once a day to see her face, although she doesn’t know I’m there.
Today, though, I was told she’s taking a few days’ vacation. Dr. Lennox advised that she said she needed some time to rest and recuperate. She’d returned to work immediately after the incident and hadn’t had time to process what she’d been through.
Today was the first time I hadn’t seen her, and I found I was missing her. I’ve considered going to her place a few times, but I remind myself that she doesn’t want anything to do with my world. I can’t ignore who I am and won’t turn my back on the MC, my surrogate family.
“You look tense,” Dani, one of the Angels, says, walking up to me.
I return the beer bottle to my lips and take another swig. Resting the pool stick against the table, I turn to Axle and ask, “I look stressed?”
Smirking, he says, “Look like you ain’t had your dick sucked in a while, my friend.”
I hold my two middle fingers up to him before grabbing my crotch and then the pool stick again.
“Come on, fuck up this game so I can go home.”
