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Lucca stood, and so did they. They followed his footsteps, and I kept my eyes on Lucca. Afraid to look down and make a rash movement.
“Don’t be afraid,” Lucca murmured as my eyes closed.
“I’m not.”
He found humor in my words as he’d exhaled quietly through his nose.
“They are very smart.”
His fingers feathered my neck before they wrapped behind its base, pulling my body closer for our bodies to meet. I liked the way he felt against me. Even enjoyed the overpowering sense he brought along.
Lucca wasn’t gentle; all his movements were always harsh and direct, but something about them attracted me deeper to his roughness. He handled my body with power, and I could feel how I submitted to his controlling touch.
While in his hands, I found myself at his mercy. It was sickening how easily my body and heart betrayed me. But desire was a feeling I had been deprived of, and now, with him near, it was one I wanted to explore.
It was exhilarating. The touch of a man.
His touch.
How I felt powerless under the weight of his hand and small beneath his tall frame.
I shouldn’t let it win, shouldn’t allow his strength to excite me. However, as his thumb spread open, lifting my head harshly, I opened my eyes to stare at his cold and dark brown eyes.
I wanted to touch, feel, and enjoy his skin as he did mine, and it infuriated me.
I was supposed to be repulsed by him,not this.
I pulled back.
Lucca’s hand fell, and his eyes narrowed.
Wex and Vino stood behind both sides of their master, waiting.
Neither of us moved, only our eyes held each other. I should have stayed, played the part. It was what I wanted and planned to do. To be vulnerable enough for him to trust me, but I wouldn’t have playeda part. It would have been real.
“How am I supposed to teach them who you are, and show them who is mine to protect, if you step away from my touch?” While his words were collected, I could also hear their annoyance.
“I’ve been patient.” Lucca’s tone darkened. “And I’ve given you time, Katia. Time to adjust, time to come to terms with this.” His hand waved in slow circles and fell. “But right now, I’m losing my tolerance.”
My head shook, listening as my pulse quickened. He didn’t get it. He was a man. A boss. Lucca had nothing to fear, nothing to feel.
Could he not see the difference?
I wasn’t dead inside.I felt.
And I could only allow so much because I was already broken with issues I’d never faced. I’d only hidden them. And he was the last person I should allow myself to feel with. Lucca would never care.
“Come,” he ordered.
I didn’t.
“Now.”
My heels took one small step, and Lucca’s head arched back. Our eyes fought as he waited, and I took the last step. It wasn’t as close as when he held me. My approach wasn’t enough for him because his hands gripped my hips forward, and my hands shot to his shoulders, holding on to him to keep my feet grounded by his pull.
Some would call this an embrace as we stood wrapped in each other, but I held on to the distance between our chests.
This couldn’t be the only way to convey what he wanted for his dogs. The only way for them to trust me enough to not see me as a threat. And how could we display affection when we didn’t do such a thing, and never have tried?
