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“How’s the morning sickness?”
“It’s changed to mid-afternoon.” I giggled, and Sawyer laughed, patting my shoulder before he left.
Brielle shifted a few things around on her desk, making room for her laptop.
“That’s what I want.”
“What?” Brie asked, looking at me over her shoulder.
“That. I want that. You and Sawyer have what I want. That is something I want with Asher. That’s why I haven’t told him yet. I mean, look at the two of you.”
Brie sat down and slid her chair over to me. “If you want what we have, then you need to tell him. But know that things weren’t always this way between us. It took a long while for him to trust me again. I mean, I robbed Sawyer of experiencing all the baby things with Emma. The only memories he has of her were from the time he met her to now. I was wrong about doing that. You’re wrong to do this to him.”
“I know.”
“I just don’t understand what the big deal is?”
“Brie, he told me he doesn’t want children.”
“When did he say that?”
“He told me back before I knew I was pregnant. Well, before I knew anyway. He thinks I can’t have children, and he was relieved. He didn’t even falter when I told him.”
Brielle looked at me, her arms crossed over her chest. “Bella, I don’t know what to tell you. You can’t keep doing this to him, or yourself. You are going to end up hurt if you don’t figure things out.”
“I’d planned on doing it. I just… I couldn’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m in love with him.”
The room grew quiet. Brielle stood there looking at me, while I just wanted to crawl under the desk and hide.
“I don’t know what to tell you. Just tell him soon or I can guarantee he’s going to find out. Eventually, you’re gonna pop, and….”
“I know…I know…I’ll tell him this weekend. We are going to a music festival up the coast. When he drops me off on Sunday, I’ll do it.”
* * *
I satin the waiting room reading a magazine that I’d found lying on the table. I glanced down at my watch. It was already half an hour past my appointment time. I frowned, wondering what was taking so long. I threw the magazine down and picked up another one when I heard my name called.
A nurse stood inside the door that led to the waiting room. I smiled, placed the magazine back on the table, and followed her down the hall. I followed her into an exam room, where I saw a gown on the end of the table.
“Sorry, Bella, Doctor Love had an emergency delivery, which is taking longer than expected. He asked me to do your ultrasound. He’s hoping by that time he’ll be back up to finish your appointment.”
“Oh, well, I can always come back another day if it’s more convenient.”
“Nope, no need. These things sometimes happen. We will get everything taken care of. So, please, get undressed. You may leave your undergarments on, gown open at the front. I’ll be back in a few minutes.” She smiled as she pulled the door closed, leaving me in the empty room.
I placed my things on the chair in the corner and began getting undressed. I was feeling nervous about this appointment, and I wished I’d taken Brielle up on her offer to come with me today. It would have helped to calm me down a little to have her here, I thought to myself.
Once I had the gown on, I pulled it closed at the front and hopped up onto the end of the table and sat there waiting. Finally, I heard a soft knock on the door and it opened an inch.
“Alright, Bella, all ready?” the nurse asked, taking a peek into the room. Once she saw me sitting there, she closed the door behind her. Then she pulled the curtain closed around the table.
She adjusted the table a bit. “Alright just lean back here,” she said, standing beside me while I shifted myself and rested my back against the cold paper-covered table.
I watched as she walked around and turned on the monitor, then she grabbed a tube of jelly. “This may be a little cold,” she said, removing the sides of my gown off my belly and squirting some gel onto my skin.
