AllFreeNovel
Share Us
The realization on his face when he looked at my son was laughable. He went through the stages of grief, basically. Shock. Disbelief. Bargaining (probably, since heisthat self-absorbed) and whatever the other stages are that led him to the conclusion that he was basically the unintended sperm donor for my child.
Not even that. He’s whatever is below a sperm donor. The… I don’t know. I can’t think when I’m this flustered.
And darn him for enjoying his life, posing in pictures on Spring Break with girls in bikinis while I can’t possibly consider wearing a swimsuit at the lake without having an anxiety attack over my stretch marks and the fact that my left boob is definitely bigger than the right.
And somebody please hit him with a severe case of acne or something because he is as stupidly beautiful as he was before, if not more. I hate him. I wish someone would break his perfect nose or maybe cause him to trip and chip a tooth or something.
And,excuse me, but why is it that women can go without shaving and it’s considered gross, but whenLucas-freaking-Kennedyhas scruff on his face, it makes you wonder if it tickles when he kisses?
I want to hit him with an aluminum baseball bat.
It isn’t fair. He skirted through life on the easy train. He got to have the exciting college experience, go to the beach and have fun with college students while I was averaging two showers a week and testing how long I could go without brushing my hair regularly.
Oh, and throwing up for seven months until the accident that brought Jadon here a touch earlier than expected.
Yep. Lucas was at a party on the beach, smiling for pictures with topless girls, and I chewed my nails off inside the NICU while debating whether to reach out to him or face total rejection. But what would happen? He didn’t even know my name and I know I wouldn’t trust some random stranger sending me crazy messages. Besides, I wasn’t in the right frame of mind, either.
I decided right there that I was doing it on my own. No, he had no clue, but why ruin his perfect life when he looked like a surprise baby might, I don’t know…put a damper on his day?
Jerk.
Standing that close to him after all this time changed me. I could practically taste the electricity in the air between us while all the anger I had been repressing for years emerged, and I felt myself slowly losing it. I was about to explode, but I got out of there as quickly as I could.
With a half-crazed smile I am sure frightened the site directors, I toured both of the daycares for Jadon. He seemed to like one of them, but neither really seemed like a good fit. I have one last appointment set up for tomorrow and I’m hoping this one pans out. I don’t want him around Lucas at all, so it needs to happen basicallyyesterday.
I don’t know Lucas—other than an unimpressive talent where he uses his tongue and that perfect smile to lure girls into his car—and I don’t want Jadon exposed to his lifestyle, especially since my dad likes to take him into the coaches’ office in the mornings. If it’s the afternoons only, they’re usually preoccupied with the practice and drills that Lucas wouldn’t get to be alone with Jadon and try to teach him about his awful ways of impregnating unsuspecting virgins.
I just hope Lucas isn’t the type to make this into a legal thing. I know little about that stuff, but maybe the idea of nearly five years in missing child support will keep him away.
He hasno cluewhat it takes to raise a kid and how much it costs. This daycare stuff is about to set me back, too, with my business savings, but it’s better than Jadon realizing his father is a piece of crap who embodies thehit it and quit itlifestyle.
I wonder if he has other secret children. I could start a club with the other women with crushed dreams and then maybe we’ll riot and set his car on fire. Ah,justice.
Still flustered after my afternoon, I texted Charity about what happened. She freaked out with me over text and said she was going to come home as soon as possible so she can help me cope by helping get my mind off of everything. Usually, it means her trying to get me drunk, but really I just need a vent session and then some solitude to feel better.
I called John to let him know I wasn’t feeling well and took the rest of the afternoon off. John is easygoing during the summers since there aren’t any students at school and he doesn’t feel as bad when he heads out early in the afternoons. He usually leaves around 2:00 pm or whenever his last meeting is for the day.
When I got off the phone with John, I called my dad to see what he wanted for dinner when he dropped the freaking bomb. He invited Lucas over to get to know him better.
I was fuming. Still am.
Slyly, I suggested I take Jadon out for the evening so that they could talk uninterrupted. Surprisingly, he was fine with it, but it’s probably so he can eat meat without feeling bad. Whatever, they can have their time and if Lucas is stupid enough to tell my dad who he is to Jadon, it’s his own funeral. Part of me hopes he is that stupid, so my dad will take care of him for me. I mean, heck, I’ll carry the shovel if we need to go bury his body in the backyard. I just hope no one comes looking for him.
I hate how he can say so few words to me after all this time and get this kind of reaction. Mixed feelings. Full resentment with a touch of curiosity.
Would things have been different if I’d just reached out to him? Would he have wanted to be part of this with Jadon?
Would he have wanted me? To do this together?
I won’t hold my breath.
I especially hate thatLucas-freaking-Kennedyis suddenly trying to come off like some nice guy just because I know he wants to impress my dad, who shouldn’t have helped him get hired in the first place. Lucas Kennedy is not a nice person and is a user and self-centered and… gosh, this is exhausting.
Nope. He’s not getting Jadon, and I’ll be that helicopter mom or whatever they call them when it comes to Lucas. He is nothing more than a blank space on Jadon’s birth certificate, and it’s going to stay that way.
Chapter11
Lucas
