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“Are you serious? It doesn’t make any sense to me.” My voice dripped with desperation, practically begging him to stay without saying the words. “I was expecting some grand epiphany before you left. Some magical way of thinking I hadn’t previously had. My change hasn’t been great enough. Hasn’t warranted you leaving me just yet.”
His grip behind my head tightened, and he pressed his forehead to mine.
“It isn’t about a grand epiphany, Jems. There’s no magical way of thinking.”
“I’m not ready for you to leave.”
“And I’m not ready to leave you. But… they’re telling me I have no choice.”
“Tell them you need to stay.” I pressed my lips against his. “Tell them you need us… for us both to heal together…”
“I’m a spirit, Jemma.” His mouth found mine quickly, then he pulled away. “I had to beg for what we shared these last couple of weeks. I’m sorry I never told you that. I’m not meant to be here with you long term. Not like this.”
“It isn’t fair,” I said in between choked words. “I don’t want to go in there. Not without you. Not if these are the last moments we get to share. I’d rather wait out here with you for the rest of my life. If going in there means you have to leave.”
His aura flickered, as if in direct response to what I had said.
“I’m not going anywhere. Not really,” he said. “I’ll be around you. Watching over you. Until you’re ready to join me. One day. In the very, very distant future.”
“In our dream home in the sky,” I murmured, not willing to accept the reality that Jamie’s departure was imminent.
He squeezed his arms around me.
“You’re my eternal flame, Jemma,” he said, as he started to fade away. Even his words grew softer. As if now I was hearing him distantly. “I’m going to spend the rest of eternity trying to show you that. Just… promise me one thing?”
“What’s that?”
“Every choice you make… remember that when you make it… you’re affecting me as well. You’re not living for one anymore. You’re living for two. Even if I’m not able to talk to you about it.”
He pressed his lips to me, choking out sobs as his mouth found mine. He squeezed me tightly, like a child who didn’t want to give up the most precious of toys. He gripped on to me as though he had every intention of never letting go.
Our mouths found one another. I shut my eyes, pressing them together so tightly it nearly hurt. My fingers clung into his back, bunching the material of his jacket together.
“Don’t leave me,” I begged once more through choked words.
I love you, he sent, though I barely heard him this time. A buzz of energy swarmed around us. A pull from somewhere else in the universe, reaching for Jamie and dragging him away.
“I love you,” I said, nearly screaming the words as the final burst of energy shot through us.
The front door creaked open behind me.
“Jemma?” I heard Mom’s voice. “Jemma? Who are you talking to?”
At the sound of her voice, I opened my eyes.
Jamie was gone.
Chapter Fifty-Nine
Alone
“Who are you talking to, Jemma?” Mom repeated.
A rawness clung around my exposed hands, as a rush of wind crept up, prickling my bare skin, and then faded away. I heard my mother’s voice, but I didn’thearher. My mind was elsewhere. Caught between the physical reality where I’d spent the last thirty-two years, and a spiritual place I was only coming to understand.
My arms remained extended, as if still embracing Jamie, grasping air in the space where he had stood only moments before. His absence instantly felt like a punch to the gut, as if something had been ripped out from inside of me, leaving a gaping hole.
“Jemma!” Mom demanded. “What the hell are you doing?”
