AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“What the fuck,” I breathed, exhaling a mixture of disbelief and shock at this ethereal fucking experience.
“Jemma…” Jamie’s voice welcomed me, drew me closer to him. Though I didn’t dare look over.
“What are you doing here, Jamie?” I murmured, tone as breakable as glass.
Without a beat, Jamie said:
“I’m here to save you.”
Chapter Nineteen
The Visit
“Save me?” I asked incredulously. “You’re here… to save…me?”
How couldhe, of all people, be here to save me? We’d been down that road before—fifteen years ago. You know, that night hesavedme, and I ended up trying to drown myself. Not that I blamed Jamie for my decision but… he certainly hadn’t helped.
My mouth hung open, heart straddling the line between agitation at his statement and anguish at the idea that this was actually him.
I still hadn’t looked over where I could feel his presence sitting in the passenger’s seat. I wasn’t sure if this was because I couldn’t bear the idea of seeing him after all these years or couldn’t bear the idea that this would all be a lie.
My stomach fluttered, increasing in direct proportion with the rising heat in my body. A blank look draped over my face. I wasn’t completely convinced that Jamie’s spirit was here to talk to me. Even after all the research I did on Near Death Experience back in the day. That stuff wasn’t real. I no longer believed.
What happened to the computer shutting off and a person beingdonezo? Both things Jamie had once said to me. My mind flashed back to that conversation he and I had in the common room. He swore with conviction there was no such thing as life after death. And, as much as I wanted to believe he was wrong, every analytical part of my brain agreed with him. He made such a clear argument back then that I’d stopped believing. All that time spent on searching for answers to somehow reconnect with my dad, and it came to a halt with one single debate.
Now, here Jamie was. His spirit which should no longer exist, that was. Sixteen years after we first met. Fifteen years since my suicide attempt. And he—the one guy who wasn’t there for me the night I needed him the most—had the goal of saving me?
What bullshit.
“It isn’t bullshit,” Jamie said. As if he could read my thoughts.
Wait… can he goddamn read my thoughts?
“Yes,” he replied, matter-of-fact.
I huffed.
“How are you doing that?” I asked. “Would you mind cutting it out?”
“What? Reading your mind?”
“Yeah. That. Stop it.”
He chuckled, his voice sounding deeper than I remembered. I fought the urge to twist over and glare at him—where I presumed he was, anyway. Like glancing over at him would potentially make this too real. And I wasn’t ready for real just yet. If it even was real at all.
Fuck me, man.
“Iamreal, Jemma,” Jamie said. “Unfortunately, I can’t stop reading your thoughts. Even if I wanted to.”
“Yeah, well, try harder.”
“I… I’m confused. I’ve been reading your letters… the ones you write to me. You wrote me twenty…twenty… letters.” He paused for a moment. Then continued in the saddest voice I’d ever heard him use. “I thought you would want to see me…”
“You’ve been reading my letters?” My voice jumped an octave as my eyes widened. Not because I wouldn’t want Jamie to read my messages, but because of the bewilderment that he actuallycouldread them. All those letters I’d written… never expecting it could have even been a possibility that he was still out there to receive them. My insides trembled, a rawness clinging to every inch of every wall of my internal body.
“Of course I’ve been reading them,” he whispered.
“Right. A dead guy is reading my letters.”
