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“I knew then that you were everything I could ever want.” He chuckled to lessen the impact. “Of course, that was through the eyes of a child. Now we’re bumping up against thirty with a fair amount of baggage between us.”
“I guess that was inevitable.”
“And despite it all, I still feel the same. I will always think of you as the ‘one,’ even if I shouldn’t. I know you’re torn. You told me you’re worried about hurting me, but, funny enough, I worry about the same damned thing.” He continued to face me, his thumb rubbing over my knuckles. “I left the army with a lot of shit. I can be a fucking mess, and I hate the idea of dumping all that on you. I don’t think your independence is worth sacrificing for me. So, if you’re still on the fence, there you go.”
I stared at him, and held back the tears prickling in my eyes. A tidal wave of emotions crashed all around me. The last several weeks had been anything but the norm. I’d expected to wake up with that burning restlessness I’d gotten accustomed to in the past, but it never came. My attempt to stay away had failed miserably, and now, all I could see was Noah,myperson from before I was even in double digits. We’d both changed, but that connection remained as strong as ever, and we both knew it. I shook my head, deciding in that moment not to take the out he offered. “No, Noah.”
Confusion furrowed his brow. “What? I’m not sure I understand.”
“I think I might be making some big changes.” I reached up and pulled him to me in a fierce hug. It took less than a second for him to reciprocate. His arms tightened around me and he buried his face in my hair, his breath warm on my neck.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
I curled up in the corner of Noah’s couch, rum and Coke in hand, and watched him wrap up his radio show. He’d told me once that he preferred to reach out to others on his terms, and listening to his animated banter seemed reminiscent of another, less troubled time for him. Even the music he chose was very specific to that moment in his life.
“I’ll sometimes just record CDs earlier and set them to go at a specific time if I can’t be home for whatever reason. Not as much fun, though.” He pulled off his headphones, and pushed back the boom microphone, but let the music fill the room.
He rose, stretched, and smiled at me. “C’mere a minute.”
I didn’t. I smirked instead. “Why?”
“This is a great song. Shame to waste it.”
“You could play it anytime.”
“Yeah, but the moment would lose its meaning.”
There was no way I could not respond to the sweet sentiment as Bruce Springsteen’s “Human Touch” rose and flowed around us. I placed my drink on the coffee table and crossed over to him. Noah caught me, dipped me down and back, before he pulled me in to keep me close. It was less a dance, and more of an extension of the fierce hug we’d shared at The Sanctuary. I rested my cheek against his chest as we swayed, the warmth of his body and the steady beat of his heart bringing a calmness I didn’t remember enjoying in a very long time. Springsteen gave way to Brett Young’s “In Case You Didn’t Know,” and our dance continued. He hummed along, throwing in a lyric or two when he remembered them.
“You should have volunteered for karaoke,” I teased.
He dipped me again. “Bite your tongue.”
Half-way through the song, our dance came to a stop. Noah threaded his fingers into my hair and gently tugged my head back so he could see my face. His dark eyes stayed on mine and I could see the question in them, even as my pulse leapt. I closed my eyes when he leaned in to press his lips to my forehead, both cheeks, and the tip of my nose. “Klahanie, I need to tell you, or I’m going to explode. I’ve loved you since we were six years old and I can’t imagine dancing in my living room with anyone else.”
“Even Helene?”
“Even Helene. She wouldn’t let me lead.”
Before I could think of a retort, his lips connected with mine, a gentle touch, a slow perusal. When I wrapped my arms around his neck and returned the kiss, something deep and hungry inside escalated. We pressed as close as possible, mouths anchored, as he dropped his hands to my hips to keep me secure. Even as his arousal became evident, he pulled his lips from mine to trail warm kisses from my ear and down the side of my throat. A shudder racked my entire body, and the slow burn of tension spiraled into my lower belly.
He pulled away to meet my gaze again, found what he was looking for, and swooped me up into his arms. I pressed tiny kisses to his mouth and jaw as he carried me into the other room.
“You going to show me what you’ve learned?” I could barely find my voice, and it came out low, rough, and trembling. Nerves zapped through me, despite my lack of virginity. I didn’t remember feeling this way with any previous boyfriend, but in fairness, in my zest for independence, there hadn’t been many.
“Only if you say please.” He flashed a roguish grin at me.
“Please.”
“And just so you know, I’ve got plenty of Coke in the fridge. I won’t be going anywhere.”
I wove my fingers into his hair and kissed him again, hard. “You’d better not.”
“No, ma’am.”
Noah placed me on the bed, and followed me down. With soft, warm lips, and dexterous fingers, he removed my clothing, one piece at a time, and covered any newly revealed flesh with open-mouthed kisses and light scrapes from his teeth. When every square inch of skin had been revealed to him, a low groan escaped him. “You’re gorgeous, Klahanie.”
“You’re not so bad yourself.” He’d stripped off his flannel and undershirt, but seemed more concerned with my pleasure than his own needs.
