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“My girl, this is what it's like to have a man in your life. No one would pass you over for a game,” she states, then walks back into the house.
“Who the hell would pass over a woman to play a video game?” One of the men with Xavier asks, as he walks by me.
“Someone who didn’t care about his family. That’s who,” I snap, before going to my car and making sure it is cleaned out.
* * *
Once we left my parents’ house, the drive to Xavier’s was quiet. Jackson sang along to a Taylor Swift song. I start to giggle when he hits the chorus and starts doing the dance moves.
Once we arrived at the house, the men moved my stuff into the room Xavier had showed me and they left me set up my stuff.
The first thing I placed on my dresser was the shadowbox of images that remind me of my Angel. I stared at it for a few minutes and then started to put my clothes away.
“Who does this represent?” Xavier says, from behind me.
I am so lost in what I am doing that I open up. “A little over a year ago I was in an accident on my way to the hospital. I was in labor, and my then boyfriend decided playing a video game was more important than making sure me and my baby made it to the hospital. I had to pull over and breathe through a contraction, and I was hit from behind, spinning me into oncoming traffic. I was hit again and my car flipped. There was too much damage and stress to my body and I lost my little boy. It is also the day I decided I was done with men.”
“Dale…I’m so sorry,” Xavier whispers, but doesn’t move closer to me.
“I wish he was still here. I wish my son Angel was still with me, experiencing all the things this world has to offer. No matter how bad the world gets, to see it through the eyes of a child makes you want to make the world a better place.”
The room is silent. I know Xavier has left me to my thoughts, but they never go away. I always have the demons of the day I lost my son.
Instead of going down to the kitchen to eat with the staff, I finish putting away my clothes and curl into a ball on the bed, letting the sleep wash over me.
Maybe for tonight the dreams will stay away, and I can wake up in the morning ready to tackle my new position. I am ready to silence the demons, and start fresh with this new opportunity.
XAVIER
Listening to her talk about the accident is heartbreaking. I didn’t know my girl with the sad eyes had so much destruction sitting on her soul.
“Xav, are you okay?” Jackson asks, as he enters the living room from the kitchen carrying the food so we can continue watching our show.
“I…I don’t know, Jack.”
“Is Dale all right?” he asks, placing the food on the table.
“The accident…” I start, but stop. I am in disbelief of the utter devastation she has been through, and then to just start over. She has to be hurting. I know she is hurting, but the strength she shows to move from day to day, has me realizing she is stronger than any man I can think of, including myself.
“What about the accident? Xavier, you zoned out,” Jackson states, causing my head to turn and stare at him.
“She lost a full-term baby that night. That accident took the life of a child who hadn’t experienced his first breath of air,” I say, slowly lowering myself to the chair and leaning back.
“Fuck me, seriously?” Jackson asks, not expecting an answer.
“She just told me upstairs. I asked her about the shadow box she lovingly placed on her dresser and it was like a robot took over. She told me what happened, then she closed down.”
“Dude, that woman is strong. Most people I know that had a heartbreak like that would fold. But she survived.” I nod, and Jackson stares into the black screen of the TV.
“Not really in the mood to watch serial killer shows,” I mumble, looking at my fingers.
We spent the night quietly talking about how much we need to show Dale she deserves to be treated with respect. Then we both agreeing to turn in for the night.
* * *
“I know, Damien. The meeting is at ten a.m. and I land at nine. Doesn’t mean I won’t be late. The traffic in Manhattan is horrible,” I say to the other Don. He and I are the youngest members to sit at the kings table. In fact, we co-captain the table. Making some of the older members pissed off.
“No worries, the older members can get coffee or a lap dance to settle themselves. Don’t rush through traffic,” Damien states then hangs up the phone.
