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Behind me, Judah has frozen. I can barely breathe as he slowly pulls his fingers free. Peeking over my shoulder, my heart plummets when I see him staring down at his hand, which has two fingers smeared with fresh, bright red blood. I open my mouth to say something, make some excuse that doesn't exist, to blow it off like it's no big deal, but I hear something else first.
Voices from further down the beach are coming closer.
We barely have time to straighten up, me tugging my bikini bottom back into place while Judah adjusts his erection before my father and Tom turn the corner, snorkeling gear in hand.
For a second, I think it's all over. Surely they'll be able to see what just happened written all over my face because how am I supposed to be unaffected by this?
"Judah! Shit, did you cut yourself?" Dad asks loudly. He frowns in concern, looking at the smear of blood on Judah's long fingers, which he didn't have time to wipe away.
I turn away, unable to hide my horrified look and snatch the sunscreen off the ground just for something to do.
"It's nothing. I already stopped bleeding." I hear Judah reply calmly, waving Dad off when he starts to move closer. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him wipe the blood off on his towel.
"Isobel, I think Nolan was looking for you." Tom chuckles as he unscrews the top of his water bottle. "I apologize in advance if he's pushy. The kid was practically raised by real estate agents. He's not real familiar withsubtle."
I don't look at Judah as I edge around the picnic table, overly conscious of the sharp ache between my legs. "It's fine," I say, but my throat tightens when I realize Dad is looking at me. He'sreallylooking at me, and there's dark suspicion in his eyes.
Chapter Ten
Isobel
Thesunislowin the sky by the time everyone has had enough of snorkeling, and we climb back on the boat, tired and tan.
I can still feel the ache that Judah's fingers left inside me, and every time I see him lift his bottle of water to his lips or adjust his glasses, I press my thighs together, and my sex gives a dull throb. I can't look at him without blushing, but it gets so much worse when we get off the boat back at the resort, and my mother's hand reaches out to snatch my wrist as I pass.
"What have you done to yourself, Isobel?"
I never bothered to get completely redressed, just threw on a cropped t-shirt, and you can clearly see most of my lower half. Mom’s eyes are narrowed, and she’s glaring down at my hip, where there are five small round bruises. For a moment, I'm confused, racking my brain for how I possibly could have gotten them, but when I glance down at my other side and see more, my body floods with heat when I realize what they are.
Fingerprints. From Judah's hands squeezing my hips when he bent me over and ate my pussy like his last meal.
I open my mouth, trying to think of any reasonable excuse for how this could have happened, but nothing comes out. I allow her to pull me around, watching her face get ridged when she sees the matching set. She doesn't knowwho(I hope), but it's pretty obviouswhat. If Dad even mentions he saw Judah and I alone on the beach….
"No idea." I lie, pulling away from her to scramble back onto the dock, feeling the weight of everyone's eyes on me.Great, justgreat. I'm a virgin, and the entire family is still going to think I've been sleeping around. Or wait,am Istill a virgin? Do fingers count?
I quickly decide that no. They don't. Especially in comparison to the monster dick, I've seen threatening to rip out of Judah's pants. When we-
I'm halfway down the dock when my steps falter, and my mouth suddenly feels dry.WhenI have sex with Judah? Since when is fucking Evie's father-in-law a foregone conclusion? Glancing over my shoulder, I see him watching me closely, oblivious to my father's attempts to make conversation with him.
I need to get out of here. My heart pounds against my ribcage as I hurry down the path leading to the main resort area, pretending not to notice him following me. Energy is strung tight between us, vibrating in the darkening night air, practically humming the closer we get to our bungalows. I don't once turn to look at or acknowledge him, but when I finally fumble with my keycard and burst into the darkened bungalow, I don't bother closing the door behind me.
I don't have to wait long. The door thuds closed a moment later, and I stare down at my hands gripping the back of the nearest armchair.
This feels so surreal, so incredibly impossible that I'm feeling all these things. It's overwhelming, wonderful, and terrifying all at once, and when I finally find the courage to turn to face Judah, my eyes are full of tears. He's already seen me at some of my weakest moments and knows things I can barely acknowledge to myself. When does it all become too much? I've spent twenty-three years putting up walls that this man has managed to demolish in three days. He sees me, all of me, and if he decides to walk away after I give him this last piece of myself, I'm sure I'll never recover.
"I had a mental breakdown." His expression flickers, but he doesn't say a word, just stares at me from his place beside the front door as I talk. "It's why I'm graduating a year late. It's why my parents are so weird with me. Well, partially why." I shake my head, tears streaming down my cheeks. "I was having panic attack after panic attack, I'd tried so many different medications, and nothing worked. I ended up losing it in the middle of a final exam. You don't want to get involved with me. I'm… I'm a mess. Please just go.Please."
Please don't go.
He doesn't move, but when he speaks, his voice is a low drawl. "Is that supposed to scare me off, Is?"
"I've never had an orgasm." I spit at him in desperation. "I've tried. I'm broken, Judah. I'm fucked up. Go. Leave."
Outside, the forecasted rain seems to have finally arrived. Thunder rumbles in the distance, and fat drops of rain sound muffled on the thatched roof. Still, Judah doesn't move. "You think there’s something wrong with you?” He asks quietly, his lips pulling back into a snarl like I've said something foul.
"Iknowthere is." I retort, folding my arms over my chest, trying in vain to keep myself together.
Judah's jaw clenches, and he takes a step toward me. I can barely breathe as he closes the distance between us and looms over me, his eyes bright and intense. "Listen to me." He grips my jaw, forcing me to meet his gaze when I try to turn away. "You're not broken, sweetheart. You're a fuckingmiracle, and I'm going to prove it over and over again until you believe me. Starting now."
