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Then now, there was Emily. Just when I found her, I was about to lose her.
I guessed it was likely my karma from everything I’d ever done wrong in my life, but come on. At this point, the punishment far outweighed the crime.
“I feel better now,” she said, probably for my benefit. I didn’t know if she could read the tension in my face or if she even had a hint of how worried I was. But she seemed to be focused on making me feel better, which somehow made everything worse. “I don’t think we need to go to the ER. I can just go and see a PCP on Monday—”
My sharp glance shut her up. It wasn’t quite a glare, but it was a look warning her just how close to the edge I was. She’d been trying to get out of going to the ER for some time now and was convinced I was blowing this out of proportion. I didn’t know if it was wishful thinking on her end. Or maybe fear.
She must be scared, too, that something was seriously wrong with her.
Like an incurable disease.
That was the terrifying thought slicing the back of my mind. She could have some kind of stupid incurable disease that would cut her life short, and just like that, she would be gone from this world.
God, no. The knot tightened in my belly.God, if you’re there, please don’t take her away from me.
Her father had died of something like that. He hadn’t wanted to explain it to me, but toward the end of his life, he’d gotten sicker and sicker. At one point, he stopped going to the hospital for it because, according to him,“They can’t do anything about what I have anyway.”
He told me I couldn’t do anything either. I saw it was making him depressed, so eventually, I stopped asking.
He’d been throwing up a lot, too, in the beginning. And had passed out a few times as well.
God, if there’s anything else you want, take it. But don’t take her. Anything but her. Take me instead.
But none of my prayers had ever worked before, so what made me think they would work now?
I swerved into the parking lot like hell was on my heels, and in under a couple of seconds, I was out of the car and over to her side. I didn’t let her feet touch the ground, scooping her up into my arms before she could get out of the car.
She gave a little squeal of surprise when I did that, her hand wrapping around my neck and holding on for dear life.
“I can walk, you know,” she said indignantly, but I ignored her as I marched in past groups of people at the front of the emergency department. I kept going, heading straight to an empty room, until a nurse approached me.
“Sir,” she called out. “You can’t go in there.”
“She needs a bed.”
The nurse glanced between the two of us, and Emily gave her a weak smile.
“She’s sick,” I told the nurse. “She threw up and almost passed out. And she’s been feeling tired for some time.”
“Did she eat anything?”
“Yes, but it’s not food poisoning. As I said, she’s been low on energy lately, and I noticed her appetite has reduced too.” It was like all the details were coming together in my head, forming a horrible picture. “Something is wrong with her.”
“Any family history of any disease we should know about?” the nurse asked. “Any fainting spells or anything?”
Emily was about to shake her head, but then I replied, “Her father died of something incurable. I don’t know exactly what it was, but maybe you should check his medical records and find out. His name was Dominic McKinnon.”
“Alright, we can take her to room two. Can she walk?”
“Yes,” Emily quickly said.
“I’d rather she didn’t,” I said firmly as I held her tighter against me. Because something was telling me that holding on to her was the only way I could hold on to my sanity, and if I put her down right now, I just might lose it entirely.
The nurse seemed to understand that because she simply nodded and pointed me in the direction of a hospital room.
A few minutes after I’d placed her on the bed, the nurse came in and said, “We’re going to do a blood draw and take your vitals to start with. The doctor should be with you shortly, but fair warning that there was a motor accident on the fifth, so it’s possible he might not get to you for the next forty minutes.”
“That’s fine, thanks,” Emily said as she smiled at the nurse.
